Season 14, Episode 15: “Wild Things”

As the episode begins and the title card fades, we see shots of the Ladies getting their hair and makeup done, before their final group dinner in Santorini. We see them as they put on their jewelry, followed by clips of them getting into SUVs as they drive towards dinner. The scene skips ahead as we see a shot of the volcano overlooking the ocean, as well as a beautifully decorated table. We then see the Ladies pulling up to the location and making their way to the table as the scene begins…

Devyn’s Confessional: This is the most epic dinner of the trip. I’ve enjoyed myself so much with all the ladies. Well, most. I needed this trip. Let’s hope cooler heads will prevail tonight and it will be a fun time.

Elle’s Confessional: After a considerably hectic trip, I’m glad to be ending things on good terms with most of the ladies. I’m hoping tonight we can eat some good food, drink some delicious drinks, and just gab like girlfriends do. Although with these ladies… you know it won’t be even remotely close to peaceful.

Grace: LOOK AT THAT SUNSET! I’m a bit lit. *laughs*

Luciana: There it is! Wow!

Devyn: Ladies, I’m so excited about tonight. Pick a seat.

Georgia: *walks to the table* How gorgeous, bravo Devyn, bravo!

Erica: *takes my seat* Oh Dev, this really looks amazing!

Devyn: Thanks Eri.

Kathy: Beautiful scenery Devyn!

Elle: *looks at Kathy* GIRL, IS THAT MY DRESS? *cackles*

Kathy: *laughs* Like the sisters we are, Elle!

Devyn: We are sitting at the bottom of an active volcano. Tonight, hopefully it will be the only thing causing flames.

Devyn’s Confessional: These bitches just don’t know how much this walk on the wild side cost. Enjoy your touch of adventure. It’s the most some will get all year.

Grace: What a nice way to end an okay trip *laughs*

Erica: Active?

Amal: What is active? It better not be this volcano. *sits at the end of the table furthest from the volcano*

Devyn: Y’all it’s safe. Sit down.

Luciana’s Confessional: Let’s hope the Greek gods set off this volcano to finally put an end to this trip!

Devyn: Y’all have been erupting volcanos all week. This is a poetic finish.

Grace: That’s true, I like that, Dev!

Luciana: Y’all? *laughs*

Amal’s Confessional: Yes, I’m sitting as far away from the volcano as possible so if this thing goes boom, I have a head start and run my ass out of here

Grace: Elle, show the ladies the pink glittery phone I got you, I got a matching one!

Kathy: *laughs* Did Grace get you a flip phone, Elle?

Amal: Oh, how sweet, Gracie! You bought her a phone?!

Georgia: Matching phones? How…adorable is that?

Elle: *pulls out my phone* Girls, me and Grace made up, she bought me this iPhone 13!

Amal: Very adorable *side eyes Georgia*

Kathy’s Confessional: I thought Grace was broke and having family troubles, how is this bitch getting her a new iPhone 13? Make it make sense.

Erica: Matching phones? Oh my God, Besties!

Kathy: Are y’all besties? *looks at Elle*

Luciana: Well, I didn’t see this coming…

Grace: We made amends. Well needed amends.

Elle: We’re friends, you know you’re my bestie sis.

Amal: Haven’t you heard, Kath? Elle, Grace and I are the new triple threat

Grace’s Confessional: Kathy is seething and I love it, stay miserable Kath!

Kathy: I just wish I could get the same grace from you, Grace!

Erica: Amal, you might need to go blonde!

Amal: *laughs* I do want to say last night after our explosive dinner, Elle, Kathy and I actually sat down by the pool at our villa. And I would say it went really well, don’t you think girls?

Luciana: That’s wonderful! Amends all around!

Kathy: I think so. I think a lot of things were cleared up and accountability was taken on my part!

Devyn: Was Iyanla here and I didn’t know it? She’s fixing Ladies of Twitter.

Grace: They finally saw sense! And I hope you can be nicer now, Kath.

Elle: It did, we had a really good, deep conversation!

Amal’s Confessional: Listen, they apologized and I accepted it. We aren’t taking a trip to Nepal to build homes for habitat for humanity together. We’re just bring civil.

Grace: I may not have a lot of grace, but I have a hell of a lot more understanding.

Kathy: Fuck off, Grace. I’ll never care for your dirty ass

Grace: It’s clean baby! *winks*

Elle: *sips drink* Oop, here we go.

Amal: Okay, let’s not go there. Let’s enjoy the dinner. PLEASE!

Kathy: That’s not what the men in twitter say. Might wanna watch who goes down on that box. *smiles*

Luciana: So, are we eating or no?

Grace: My pussy? Purr, purr.

Devyn: Take a shot ladies. Let’s start this night off right.

Elle: *hands Kathy her shot* Let’s do it together ready?

Erica: I love a good shot! *takes it back*

Kathy: I agree. I didn’t do mediation this morning for nothing. Handle me that shot, Elle!

Amal: YES! Please! A shot! Give Georgia a double and let’s initiate the bitch.

Grace: I’m happy you both see Amal’s side, that’s all I wanted.

Georgia: *downs the double* I guess I’ll take it since it’s vacation.

Devyn: *takes shot* That was smooth! *to waiter* TWO MORE ROUNDS.

Kathy: I wanna also say that Erica and I had a moment yesterday and it was beautiful! I just wanted to take that moment and say how happy I am that we are back!

Amal: Hold on! Before we all take a shot, I think we should all say the craziest place we’ve all had sex before we each drink it!

Devyn: Well, it seems we are all at peace and unbothered. That is progress.

Erica: Yes, the Santorini air is just filled with Resolution this time around! I’m glad I’m back good with my sis! I say another shot for the peace

Amal’s Confessional: I guess not on the game. Half of these girls haven’t been laid in a decade so what’s the most exciting place? Under the covers with their left hand!

Elle: *after 3 shots and slurring* That’s nice that you made up with Erica Kath, I wish I could find that same common ground. *begins crying*

Grace: Luci, let’s kiss like we did in Spain that one time.

Kathy: Erica girl, can you and Elle talk? Can we find some resolution here?

Erica: *puts my hands behind my back and laughs* ELLE, no hands or fingers!

Luciana: *grabs Graces face and kisses her* There ya go, Gracie.

Amal: Gag!

Kathy’s Confessional: I’m sorry no one cares about two geriatrics kissing. We are here for drinks and food.

Georgia’s Confessional: I’ll tell you one thing, if you find me locking lips with my friend, Kathy Irvine. Oh…I can’t even imagine. No, I can’t even finish the thought, I’m sorry. *gets up from chair*

Devyn: YESSS!!

Luciana: *shoots Devyn a look* Calm down over there, Calamity Jane!

Elle: *still crying* I don’t want to fight with you! I wanted to be your friend and we fought and I hated it, Erica!

Erica: Elle, I never wanted to fight with you either! I always just wanted to go shopping and talk about fashion! Oh God, give me a hug *hugs Elle*

Kathy: Oh yes, another resolution!! This is how grown women move on. Too bad a lady in our group doesn’t know how to do that

Elle: *while crying and slurring* I feel like we just got off on the wrong start and I’m sorry. I feel so bad I feel like you saw a horribly vicious side of myself this year!

Erica: I get it! I get it! I never wanted us to even get to this place. I’ve been dealing with my own stuff. I get it! And I’m sorry as well.

Elle: *to Erica* Let’s do a shot together??

Erica’s Confessional: I don’t know if it’s the 5 shots of patron in me or what but I never would have thought Elle and I would make up.

Erica: Okay On 3! 1…2…3! *takes shot*

Elle: *downs the shot and goes back to take my seat* Oh, that was good!

Amal’s Confessional: I told myself I wasn’t getting involved in any drama and I was going to sit back and eat my food. That’s what I’m doing.

Luciana: Girls? Can I have a second of your time?

Georgia: Well, isn’t this nice! This is the first time I’ve ever seen more than half of this group seated and happy. *laughs*

Kathy: Yes Luci, the floor is yours.

Luciana: Thank you! You all know, I’ve been spending a lot of time working on my new lounge! And I want you all to attend my opening! It would mean the world to me!

Kathy: I’ll be there Luci. I actually plan on coming to help you set up!

Georgia: Oh Bubbles, I wouldn’t miss it if I was glued to my chair with molasses

Elle: You can count me in!

Erica: *downs the shot and listens* I’ll be there.

Grace: I’ll be there, Luci! *raises a glass* So proud of you.

Devyn: I’ll be headed to Jamaica after this so I won’t be able to make it.

Amal: I’ll come by. The food is usually edible.

Luciana: It’s in two weeks…

Erica’s Confessional: A recovering alcoholic opening a bar? I just know the place is going to be missing quite a few bottles *looks away from the camera*

Luciana: Will you be in Jamaica for the next month?

Grace: You two need to make up.

Devyn: Who knows. I have family business and a sick mother.

Elle: *slurring* When can we go swimming in the warm red pool up there? *points at the top of the volcano*

Georgia: No, no baby doll Elle. We can’t go up there.

Devyn: I don’t have a problem with Luci, Grace. You know this already.

Elle: Oh *head falls on the table*

Kathy: What’s even the issue between you two?

Devyn: There is no issue.

Luciana: She obviously has a problem…

Georgia: *walks around the table and crumpled up my napkin, placing it under Elle’s head* Here, use this darlin’.

Erica: *sees Elle and laughs* Lady down, lady down!

Elle: *to Georgia slurring* I’m gonna take a lil’ nappy nap right here! Thank you for this square white pillow!!

Georgia: *rubs Elle’s back* Perfect, a pillow, yeah.

Georgia’s Confessional: Mariah warned me Elle couldn’t handle her liquor like us older gals. *shakes head, laughing*

Grace: It’s just a bit awkward.

Luciana: You just enjoy telling me to close my legs to married men?

Kathy: WHAT?

Devyn: Are you sleeping with a married man?

Luciana: Why would you question me?

Luciana’s Confessional: Who the fuck is in her ear?

Devyn: Answer the question.

Kathy: Devyn, do you Have reason to believe that Luci is?

Devyn: Of course, Kathy. I don’t just talk out of the side of my neck. If Luci says she isn’t, I’ll apologize for saying it and move on. No question asked.

Amal’s Confessional: I zoned out for a second but when I came back to it, I heard something about a married man. Please lord let this not be about Chris Stonewood. I just calmed that shit down

Luciana: No, no, no. I want to know where you get your info from?

Grace: Probably Kathy

Devyn: So, you aren’t denying it? No, it wasn’t Kathy, Grace. Chill.

Kathy: It was probably you, Grace. I haven’t been in touch with Devyn lately.

Luciana: *looks at Kathy* Did you say something!? *looks at Grace* Was it you!?

Devyn: It wasn’t anyone in the group.

Kathy: I didn’t say a damn word. I don’t know what she’s talking about?

Devyn: Luci is sleeping with my nanny Lois’s husband. Luci can deny and we can move on.

Georgia: Nanny?

Luciana: WHAT!?

Elle: *pops up for a second* WAIT A MINUTE!

Luciana’s Confessional: WAIT! Am I sleeping with a married man? YES! But not some nanny’s husband!

Luciana: Wait a second…that is not true!

Devyn: Listen, it’s none of my business anyway. I’m sorry Luci. Bang whoever you want. *cheers*

Luciana: I’m sleeping with a different married man!

Kathy: Is he like a big poppa?

Devyn: Well damn, she admitted it.

Luciana: No! I’m his big momma!

Elle: *picks my head up hiccups and points at Devyn, slurs* Devyn. didn’t you sleep with my friend Tyler’s husband? So aren’t you being a bit hy-po-cri-ti-cal!

Devyn: Tyler and Adam were divorced for over a year. You don’t know anything about that Elle. So, mind your business.

Georgia: Like… *whispers* a sugar momma?

Amal: More like a sugar grandmomma.

Luciana: Please Dev! Mind your own!

Erica’s Confessional: Note to self, Keep my man nowhere near these ladies.

Devyn’s Confessional: The bitch knows she’s sleeping with a married man, and mad cause I said something? Chile, be mad for his wife and kids.

Luciana: *stands up* Well, this was a waste. I’m heading back to our personal villa.

Devyn: *checks her phone* Turns out I’ll make it to your grand opening after all, Luci. My mother is coming to Twitter instead. I can’t wait.

Amal: *gets up* I’ll come with you Luc. Can we stop by a gyros truck? Im starving

Elle’s Confessional: Okay, I don’t remember a lot from that dinner besides feeling like I ate a bag of rat poison the next morning, but wasn’t Devyn accusing Luci of sleeping with some married guy? Then flirting with Erica… makes you think a little, doesn’t it?

Kathy: Well ladies, his geriatric is retiring to the nearest club! Devyn, thanks for a great trip!

Devyn: You’re so welcome, Kathy.

Erica: *gets up* Kathy, did I hear club?

Amal’s Confessional: All in all, I think this dinner was a success! Big success for this group. No one was thrown in the volcano, no phones were broken, and no one was shoved into the ocean. So yes, *nods* it was definitely a success

As the Ladies begin to get up from the table and go their separate ways, the episode skips forward as the screen says “TEN DAYS LATER.” There, we are taken to a shot of Kathy’s home, as she is seen in her pajamas with her dog as the scene begins…

Kathy’s Confessional: After a crazy trip, I decided to invite over my closest girlfriends and we are going to do a PJ party and have a little slumber party with some Games and cocktails!

We then watch as Elle, Georgia, and Luciana arrive one by one…

Luciana’s Confessional: Oh, what a trip. To say I’m happy to be back on the American soil would not be a lie. I haven’t seen the girls since the trip so I need to pick their brain about Devyn.

Georgia: *seen walking up the steps to the bell and ringing* I hope my slippers don’t get too dirty, I had forgotten this place had so much grass. *looks down to feet*

Luciana: Yoooooohooooo!! Girlies wait for me!! *trots through the long grass*

Kathy: *opens the door* GIRLS! Who’s ready for PJs and party at Kathy’s!?

Georgia: You know I am! It’s great to see you girls.

Elle: Let’s get these drinks flowing! Non-alcoholic for Luci, of course!

Kathy: I figured after all the craziness from Santorini, we could use a girls night in, no drama just drinks, food, and good times. Luci’s drinking moderately, no?

Luciana: Ahhh! Not tonight!

Kathy: Okay girl, wrong time!

Luciana: *nervously goes into her bag* Anyone else smoke? *laughs*

Kathy’s Confessional: Now, Luci was throwing them shots back at the villa in Santorini. I don’t know what was in the water there

Elle: *covers her face with her purse and whispers to Luci* I’m a secret smoker I’ll always go out with you for a cig, but keep it quiet.

Georgia: Smoke? Like…*whispers* cigarettes?

Georgia’s Confessional: Listen, with this group, it’s better to check before I volunteer to smoke a crack pipe or something.

Luciana: *lights up a cigarette in the living room* So, are we playing naked twister?

Elle: Girl, maybe after the cameras go down. *laughs*

Elle’s Confessional: *Producer asks, “Did you guys end up playing naked twister?” *camera zooms in on Elle as she puts a finger to her mouth* I’ll never tell even if we didn’t.

Georgia: So, have you girls talked to any of the others? I haven’t talked to Devyn or Erica, but we ended strong. And I still don’t really know Faith

Kathy: *Luciana coughs as she takes a drag* Girl, take that smoking outside. Where you raised in a bar?

The camera zooms in on Luciana as she extinguishes the cigarette in her purse…

Georgia: Raised in a bar and building one, that’s our Bubbles!

Luciana: Well…I still can’t believe Devyn.

Kathy: Georgia you mean, love?

Georgia: Georgia I mean? *looks around* I am Georgia, darlin’

Kathy: What’s the saying, grace faith and love?

Georgia’s Confessional: I see Mrs. Irvine got a head start on the vodka!

Georgia: Grace, Faith, and Charity, I think. Whichever one that blonde is, I don’t know her. *laughs*

Luciana: Gracie!

Elle: I talked to Amal, Erica, & Grace. Devyn, I haven’t really spoken too but I think she’s still upset with me for booking a separate villa.

Luciana: She needs to go scratch.

Kathy: That Devyn is a GRUDGE holder, ladies. Y’all be prepared!

Georgia: *motions hand* I would’ve ended up drown in the pool of the other villa. That Amal nearly launched Kathy and I off a cliff. *laughs* I’m not sleeping two doors down, I ain’t Dolly Parton.

Luciana: Seriously! She has tons of issues. I’m still mad she wouldn’t apologize.

Elle’s Confessional: I don’t dislike Devyn, her and my husband are still good friends so I’ll have to see her out eventually, but girl… You knew I was booking that villa, so let it go and let’s sip some champs.

Elle: I’m glad you and I reached a state of cordiality with her, Kath.

Luciana: Did she apologize?

Kathy: She didn’t really apologize but you know how that goes. She accepted ours and we are moving on in a cordial way. Do I think that Amal and I will ever be besties? Probably not. But, she is a hell of a lot better at moving on then your guys’ friend, Grace.

Elle: Girl we are not friends, more like people who know similar people.

Georgia: They seem so…disinteresting. I don’t think she has ever even spoken to me

Elle’s Confessional: I wouldn’t even call her an acquaintance, more of like a 6th cousin twice removed that you never see unless it’s a family funeral.

Kathy: *laughs* Georgia, I know that’s right very disinteresting. *turns to Luciana* So Luci, this bar opening that we got coming up? What’s the dress code and who is coming?

Luciana: Well, I mean I’m wearing animal print since the bar is EXOTIC! I invited everyone…will they be on their best behaviors?

Elle: I will be, but the others? Girl please!

Luciana: You know Maria will be there…

Elle: Maria hates Amal, no?

Kathy: Your friend Grace just seems to want to have an issue with me. You know how I am, Luc. If she starts with me then I’m going to finish it. It’s just in my nature

Georgia: Marie who?

Luciana: Currently, who the hell knows. I just can’t keep up. Maria is my litttle sissy!

Kathy: *nudges Georgia* She’s Luciana’s sister. She likes to come shake things up from time to time

Luciana: Listen, the bar is dark and exotic, if any fight breaks out, just don’t ruin the decor and animals.

Georgia: Oh, well any Bubble of Bubble’s is a bubble of my own. I cannot wait to meet her! Animals? *eyes widen*

Elle; If it’s a fight with Maria something’s bound to break. Hopefully none of these ladies’ bones.

Kathy: I’ll just drag her ass to the alley! By the time I’m done with her, she can be one of the animals on the wall!

Luciana: Yes, animals love. They aren’t real.

Georgia: Oh shew, good, I don’t have the wherewithal to handle any deer or buffalo when I go to a bar.

Kathy’s Confessional: A bar for a recovering alcoholic sounds like a mess waiting to happen but you know me I’m going to still support my friend

Georgia: So, you said everyone. Does that mean Devyn decided not to skip town?

Luciana: Allegedly. Kinda ballsy if she does show…

Elle: She was going to skip town? I thought Amal was the only one in trouble with the law?

Luciana: She claimed that when I invited her. Wouldn’t be surprised if Devyn had trouble with the law

Georgia: She said something about Jamaica or somewhere I think. That doesn’t sound like a jailbird locale. Now if you said she was going to Iceland maybe.

Kathy: We got two runaways great! I didn’t know that I was running with the locked in love Group. Anyways, I have news to share on why I brought you three here tonight!

Georgia’s Confessional: Please say Prada, please say Gucci, something good for a change with this group. *laughs*

Kathy: It is with great sorrow that I have officially filed the papers for divorce against my husband of eight years. It has caused me to lash out at people that I had no reason lashing out at and has really put me in a dark place these past few months. But, with this new chapter that is on the horizon I am hopeful to continue to be around a strong group of ladies like yourselves because each and everyone of you three have been amazing to me on my journey both on and off camera. So, tonight is really to thank you all for your everlasting love and support!

Elle: *takes Kathy’s hand* Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry but also so proud of you for taking that step.

Luciana’s Confessional: THAT explains why she’s been so bitchy. I assumed it was just her menopause.

Georgia: Cheers to that and new beginnings! Freedom looks good on your Kathy.

Luciana: Oh no! I had no idea.

Kathy: I just asked each one of you stay patient with me and continue to support me like you guys have. I am in counseling once a week and it has been helping tremendously

Elle’s Confessional: Kathy’s so strong, it hurts me when she hurts, so I’m glad she’s taking the steps to make herself happy again.

Georgia’s Confessional: When I divorced my husband, the therapy came in the form of checks every month. *adjusts hair* We all cope differently, it’s so clear.

Luciana; Will you be okay?

Kathy: I will just need your guys support. He is wanting to clean me out.

Luciana: Well, isn’t he the breadwinner?

Georgia: Like…he wants to be the help now? His job wasn’t paying enough? Pool boy now too?

Kathy’s Confessional: James is asking for spousal support as well as over $1 million settlement so of course this is going to be extremely challenging on me but this powerhouse is made for everything

Kathy: Now, I am the breadwinner. I am the one that found it has a little sidekick that has now turned into his primary job.

Elle: Did you start the business before or after you got married?

Kathy: I started his after we were married, and mine was started before.

Elle: Then, he can’t touch your business, legally speaking.

Kathy: Not mine, but he can touch this bank account, and the home he can’t touch. It’s under Mom’s name.

Elle’s Confessional: Let’s just say last season was so horrible for me that I spoke to enough attorneys to know what can/can’t be fair game in a divorce.

Luciana: Well Kath, if you need help money wise, you know you have me. I can be your sugar momma!

Kathy: *laughs* I may need to be the host at the bar a few days a week, Luci. But girls, I say let’s send home the cameras and have some off the cuff fun!

Elle: Yes please! *rips her mic off*

Kathy: Everyone Is sleeping over!! I got eight rooms. And Luci, I’ll put you in the room with the balcony so you can smoke!

Luciana: *laughs* Wham Bam Thank you ma’am!

Georgia: *producer takes off my microphone* Better smoking and swearing than sex tapes and scenes like the other girls.

As the camera pans out and we see the Ladies laughing, the camera pans out and across Twitter, as we see Amal’s home and her putting the finishing touches on a dinner party…

Amal’s Confessional: I’ve finally settled after our trip to Santorini and I thought it time to have my girlies come over for a nice dinner party. With all the craziness of my life these past few months, I really want to thank them for their endless and undying support.

We then see as Erica and Grace make their way towards Amal’s door and enter the home…

Erica’s Confessional: I haven’t seen my girls since Santorini and although I’ve made amends with most of the ladies, Just hanging out with the ones who’ve had my back like I had theres is always a good time! Plus, we have Grace, our local comedian

Grace: *walks in and laughs* YOU SAID COZY DINNER AT HOME! What are we going out partying?

Amal: Bitch, this is cozy! *laughs and hugs Grace*

Grace: I’m old, the bones need to stay warm

Amal: *twirls* I wanted to show you how my little diet has been going! A cow no more! *laughs*

Erica: A girl could use some food! Hey ladies!

Amal: Hey friend!! Come on in! Do we know if the doctor is going to be in attendance?

Grace: I think so, I spoke to her this morning

Just then, the camera pans back to the door as we see Devyn struggling up the steps with six gift bags, then ringing the doorbell…

Erica: Speaking of the devil *looks towards the door*

Amal: Watch her show up in a ball gown just to outshine my AC/DC top!

Grace: Where’s the baby? I want a cuddle! *goes to open the door for Amal* What’s for dinner? I’m hungry!

Devyn: Help a girl out. I went crazy at Baby2Baby.

Amal: *laughs and takes the bags out of Devyn’s hands* OMG DEV! You are crazy! Thank you so much

Devyn: Whew. Those pre-black Friday sales are my favorite. I love you too A!

Erica: Dev! My lovely! Looking fabulous as always

Amal: Come in come in! Let’s get you a drink!

Devyn: Thanks Erica. I’ve been out shopping all morning.

Grace: Want a margarita?

Amal’s Confessional: What I love about Devyn is her generosity and warmth of heart! She truly is such a supportive girlfriend

Devyn: Yes please, Grace!

Amal: Exactly! Where are your manners hag?

Grace: Girls, I’m not the help.

Devyn’s Confessional: She may not be the help, but Grace is really helpful though.

Grace: But I do make a great margarita! *laughs*

A waiter then comes out and serves all four Ladies margaritas…

Grace: So, what’s new girls?

Devyn: I have news. Thanks to Mrs. Grace I sold my home and bought TWO new ones. Thanks Grace. I truly couldn’t have done it without you.

Erica: Yes!!!! Congrats to the both of you!

Devyn: Erica, you should move in. *winks*

Erica: My bags will be packed by tonight *blows Devyn a kiss*

Amal: You two! I can’t! They share a bed for 5 nights in Santorini and now they can’t live without each other. AND TWO HOMES?! Girl, what do you and your tiny body need with all that room?

Devyn: Well, Amal I figured when my unwanted guests for my Jamaica visit I will have somewhere homely to house them.

Grace: Thanks to you, Dev, I get to pay my electric bill! *laughs*

Amal: And thanks to Dev, our girl isn’t broke. *busts out laughing* I KID GRACIE!

Grace: Don’t be a Kathy!

Devyn: Grace is a rich bitch!

Grace: I have dollars, and now thanks to Dev, I have many more!

Amal’s Confessional: If Kathy is to be believed, our Gracie… *pauses* Wait, did I say if Kathy is to be believed?! *busts out laughing*

Devyn: Erica, where’s your man? That man wants me to steal his wife for good, huh?

Erica: *laughs* My man has actually been around more often, I left him at home. You know I had to get away and see my girl!

Amal: After spending 5 days in Santorini, you aren’t sick of us?! I jumped on Tommy the second I got home. Saved a lot of horses and rode that cowboy all night!

Grace: I miss the bar boy!

Amal: Of course, you do! Reminds you of a time long gone *laughs*

Grace: Listen, these cobwebs have to be wiped somehow!

Devyn: What’s up with you, Amal?

Amal: Well ladies, I actually met with my lawyer when we came back from Santorini and it looks like I have a court date

Devyn: Oh? When? We will go with you.

Amal: So, this is for the civil case. He’s suing me for defamation of character and infliction of emotional distress. But as far as I know, he is being represented by counsel so he won’t physically be here.

Devyn: Well, that’s good news.

Amal: I don’t know if that is, Dev

Grace: Fingers crossed for you my honey

Amal: He’s terrorized my life these past few months and he doesn’t have the balls to face me. I feel like I have all these things I just want to say to him. I want to look him in the eye and tell him to let me go. Let me be free. Just stop torturing me, you know *fans self*

Grace: I still think you need to be wary of Kathy and Elle, Amal.

Erica: Amal… did you used to peg him? I have questions *laughs and sips my drink*

Amal: *laughs at Erica* what means peg?

Erica: You know… *does hand motion of finger in the hole*

Amal: *sits back* Oh no, no, no! I wouldn’t ruin my manicure for him! But Gracie, I really think Kathy, Elle and I have moved on.

Grace: Well, don’t be so sure. I don’t trust Kathy, that’s for sure. But I’m going to ask to meet with her and try to become cordial. I can’t deal with her anymore. The woman that commands honesty yet doesn’t tell anyone anything about her real life

Devyn: You should Grace. I’m even going to be cordial with Luci by going to her event opening. Y’all going?

Grace’s Confessional: Kathy and I see each other, we’re not friends and won’t ever be. I just don’t want to continue this back and forth with her anymore

Amal’s Confessional: The Kathy and Grace saga has been going on for two long. These two women who are in the later stages of their life need to just get along! Hell, they should be going to the senior center together to play bingo on Tuesday nights NOT fighting.

Grace: Yeah, it should be good

Erica: I said I would go, hopefully she can behave at her own event, but liquors around so who knows *shrugs*

Devyn’s Confessional: I’m not interested in having any bad blood with Luci so I’m going to go to her event with a smile. Lord knows I have the holiday spirit this close to Christmas.

Erica’s Confessional: Luciana is very unpredictable and her unhinged actions surely show it. I have no interest in being cool with her and her beast of a sister anymore. But hey I love free drinks.

Devyn: Thanks for the food, Amal. Mya and King have ballet tonight. I better go. I love you girls.

Grace: I’m staying for a hot toddie!

Erica: *checks my phone* Well, Robert has definitely been blowing my phone up and I have something waiting for me at home. *giggles* Love you ladies, but I love the dick more.

As Erica and Devyn depart, the scene shifts again as we see Luciana’s Exotic Lounge in several clips. We then see Luciana rushing around to put the finishing touches on the event, as we see the Ladies slowly streaming in…

Luciana’s Confessional: MY BIG DAY IS HERE!!! It was the longest journey, but Luciana’s EXOTIC Lounge is OPEN!!! Where are my girls? Let’s celebrate!

Elle’s Confessional: On the invite it said wear animal print, and the only thing I had was this top with dogs on it because WHO in their right mind wears leopard? Homewreckers and whores. So here I am, in my poodle top and feather skirt! Let’s have some drinks and shake up some fun!

Kathy: *walks up to the bar* Luc, where are the sexy bartenders? What’s this honey?

Luciana: My girls!!!! Welcome! That’s Julio! He is here to help if the animatronic animals break down!

Kathy: He looks like he just got back from a Safari trip or maybe a trip in the outback!

Erica: *walks in and talks to myself* Is this the right place? What the… *turns around and looks at the sign* What is this honey…

Grace: Is this decor after the rainforest cafe?

Amal: *walks into Luci’s bar and looks around* Oh… *pauses* how umm *pauses* understated!

Georgia: Did you say Animatronics? Oh my god, is this like a grown-up Chuck E. Cheese? Grandmama said that place was too worldly for a child.

Luciana: Never heard of that place Grace! But thank you for coming! Ladies welcome! Isn’t this…EXOTIC? *twirls in a circle*

Erica’s Confessional: I don’t know where I’m at, did i get the addresses messed up? Is this the zoo? *looks around* I see the drinks were in here when designed this place!

Grace: Congratulation honey!

Kathy: Very exotic. Maybe more exotic than some of these girls’ Puss around here.

Erica: This is so… so *smiles and nods*

Georgia: I love it, Bubbles. You’ve outdone yourself, this screams “Acid Trip Party Nights.”

Luciana: Everyone grab drinks from the bar! Bubbles has a speech coming. And you all need to toast to me.

Devyn: Is she calling herself by her nickname only one person calls her? That’s so Luci.

Amal: *scoots over to the girls but has to hold onto my breasts so they don’t fall out* Hi love! This is very colourful! How nice!

Kathy: *looks at list of signature mixed drinks * She named one “Monkey’s Asshole.” That Luci is really something

Luciana: *walks over to the DJ* Can you play exotic jungle dance music?

Kathy’s Confessional: Luci‘s bar reminds me of a time in the 80s where I was at a college frat party, and they gave me a little capsule and then I started seeing things like Luci‘s bar

Just then, the camera spins around as we here a strong beat playing, and Maria, Luciana’s sister, is seen making her way into the bar…

Georgia: *looks to the door* That must be Bubbles’ sister, Marinara!

Erica: *looks over and jumps* Ah! I thought I saw a beast

Luciana: Ohhh, here is Miss Maria!! The general manager here! And my baby sissy!!

Devyn’s Confessional: Luci might be back on the sauce and this is her way of telling us.

Kathy: MARIAAA!! That’s our blow-up Barbie!!

Maria: *sees Amal* Hello, hello, hello!

Elle’s Confessional: Maria only comes around to fight so who’s she gonna beat the crap out of this time?

Grace: The lips got bigger! What a generous aesthetic lady you have, Maria!

Maria: How are my dolls doing!? You all playing nice?!

Erica’s Confessional: Seeing Maria is very… she’s just there. I heard she’s “after” me, but she needs to be after that doctor who botched her surgery *smiles towards the camera*

Kathy: Playing as nice as we can Maria. You know how this group can be *laughs*

Amal: Hi gorgeous girl Maria!

Erica: Girl anyways. *sips my drink*

Maria: Did you follow through? *looks at Amal*

Kathy: *looks at Erica * Do you not like Maria or something??

Georgia: Miss Marinara, may I say, you are a stunning curvy lady. Your sister has a heart of mozzarella cheese, and that’s my favorite strain.

Erica: *to Kathy* I guess she has a problem because of her sister and my comments towards her *shrugs*

Maria: *laughs at Georgia* Who the hell are you?

Amal: Me? Of course, I did! I spoke with her. It didn’t help though

Kathy: Erica. I haven’t heard you talk badly of her!

Just then, Luciana exits the bathroom and tells all the guests that she has a brief speech…

Luciana: Hi all! Everyone…I have a small speech. I want to thank you all for being here. This has been a dream of mine since I was 21. Well maybe 13. Who’s really counting! You all know this last year has been rough, but I’m happy to say I’m sober Luci. This is me. And Sober Luci can open a bar! You may have doubts! But I can do it, and I AM doing it.

Devyn’s Confessional: She started drinking at 13? That explains the wrinkles.

Luciana: Everyone let’s cheers to me. Raise those glasses. To many more years of fun and success and SEX!

The camera pans around as we see the group raise their glasses in a toast to Luciana…

Luciana: *raises two glasses* EXOTIC CHEERS! Let the jungle dance music PLAY MISTAAA DJ!!

Luciana’s Confessional: Life is what you make it. I made my life, with amazing family, and amazing supportive friends.

Luciana: *walks over to Kathy* I can’t believe Devyn showed up.

Kathy: Maybe she’s not that bad of a grudge holder after all!!

Amal’s Confessional: Everyone seems to be getting along swimmingly! I think it’s great how we have all been able to move on and just enjoy each other. There must been something in the jungle air

Devyn: *walks up behind Luciana* Congrats. Here’s a bottle of sparkling apple cider.

Luciana: Oh! Devyn! When did you get here? Didn’t see you come in!

Kathy: Oh, well if we aren’t speaking of the devil. Have a seat DEVYN!

Devyn: Which is it girls? But, hi Kathy.

Kathy: We were just talking about how happy we were to see you here tonight supporting Luci!

Luciana: Anyway…I’m assuming by you coming is your way of moving on with me?

Devyn: Moving on with you? I never had an issue with you, Luci.

Luciana: Yes? Remember our tiff? You told me to close my legs to married men…

Kathy: Luci seems to think there is one with you two. So, what’s going on?

Devyn: Well did you do the thing I suggested?

Luciana: Yes. Well, yes, I did. But why do you need to go around announcing it?

Luciana’s Confessional: If I want to get banged by a married man, how is that my problem? I’m the single one! I also have a lot of money.

Devyn: It was only 4 of us Luci. I just made an educated guess, and your lack of denial confirmed it.

Luciana: Well, it really shows how classy you are.

Devyn: I’ve never claimed to be classy. I’m a SAVAGE, bougie and ratchet.

Kathy: What was the Devyn you told us to do? Be a lady? So, let’s start acting lady like here.

Luciana: And very trashy too Devyn. You forgot that one. A lady…she will never be.

Devyn: I’m not a lady either? Wow, y’all think highly of me. And trashy? I’m trashy? Says the woman that opened a jungle to cover for her drinking.

Kathy: Well, I would think that somebody that works in the medical field would be somewhat professional, but I guess to each their own?

Luciana: WHAT? I’m sober! We just did a toast! For me! I’m sober!

Devyn: Okay, MS I’M SOBER. CHEERS!

Luciana’s Confessional: What does opening a jungle have to do with me drinking? The bigger issue here is she doesn’t like jungles or zoos? Maybe I need to call PETA on her ass.

Devyn: Also, Ms Kathy, this place might look like the inside of your vagina, but I don’t have to be professional in a non-professional setting. Luci, I hope this place is a success. *walks away*

Devyn’s Confessional: Listen, if the worst thing someone says is close your legs to married men, you might be winning. Luci is so damn sensitive about facts. It’s truly sad. Don’t they teach you to live in reality in AA?

Grace: *walks over* Hi Kathy, you look nice tonight! Would you care if we chat for a minute?

Kathy: Sure, we can chat, let’s go sit over there. *walks to a table with Grace and sits*

Grace: So, Kathy, I want to bury the hatchet with you and have a real talk with you. Mother to mother, old grandma to another/

Kathy: I am down for some geriatric talk! You just need to let me know a date and time! I don’t think we need to discuss much more until then!

Grace: And I want us to come with the intentions on wanting to understand each other, we could do breakfast later this week?

Kathy: I can do breakfast that! I think we both need to come with open hearts. You can text me the place and time, I’ll be there! *walks off*

The camera then pans to Amal as she walks towards Maria with Erica…

Amal: Erica, have you met Maria? She is Luci’s baby sister.

Maria: *turns to Amal* Oh, what did you say dough dough bird?! *looks at Erica*

Erica: Oh, this is the infamous Maria, I loved you better on gremlins, love.

Amal’s Confessional: I’ve been on the receiving end of Maria’s wrath and it’s not pretty. I hope Erica knows what she’s in for.

Maria: Oh, this Gremlin gets more action then you will ever get. Did Amal let you have it? Amal is done with you.

Amal: I’m what? No, I never said I was done with her, Maria

Maria: Remember we had chicken parm? We made a deal!

Amal: I said I would talk to her about retracting her statement about Luci’s drinking, which we talked about

Erica: What are you, her boss? Shut up. Maria look, I’m not taking back what I said. Your sister is still a drunk, she opened a bar for crying out loud. Sorry that you’re so incompetent to see it. *shrugs*

Maria: We’re basically family. WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

Erica: I said… your sister is a drunk and you’re an incompetent fuck who couldn’t see the signs if she was given a telescope.

Elle: *walks over and stands in between Maria and Erica* Erica, I’m telling you this for your own safety, run.

Maria: *grabs the bottle of Apple cider that Devyn gave to Luci and throws it against the wall* GET OUT ERICA. LEAVE!

Erica: Oh MA’AM!

Amal: *crouches down on the floor* OH MY GOD!

We then watch as production comes in to separate the two…

Kathy: *looks at this mess* Luci and Maria let’s bring it on down. You guys have investors here.

Elle’s Confessional: There really is about to be another murder in Luci’s restaurant.

The camera pans to Maria as she screams while being taken towards the exit…

Erica: Are you a lunatic? Like, you crazy monster!

As the Ladies are separated, the cameras come down and the screen fades to black as the episode comes to an end.

Next time on the season finale of Ladies of Twitter…Kathy and Grace sit down on last time, to try and resolve their issues. Georgia hosts a Ladies’ Lunch at her home, but Luciana’s drinking takes center stage. As the group gathers for a charity event, the Ladies’ newfound peace is destroyed when a surprise guest shows up to the party.