Season 16, Episode 15: “Christ Save the Irredeemable”

Ladies of Twitter
40 min readFeb 20, 2024

As the episode begins and the main title card fades from the screen, we see clips of Rio as the hot sun beams down over the city and we see the Ladies, with the exception of Amal, getting dressed to head out for dinner. We watch as they all quickly get into SUVs, as they drive away before the scene shifts and we see a beautiful dock and yacht, as the Ladies arrive and settle on the boat before it takes off…

Teairra’s Confessional: It’s been a minute since we ALL been together in Rio seeing that the last get together was horrific, I know for a fact it may happen again, but I’m ready for it, I mean what else can you expect, but I’m kinda in a calm aura right now! Rio is gorgeous.

Billie’s Confessional: Oh, Rio has not been has grande as I expected it to be, instead I’ve been dealing with bitter bitches and shitty activities thanks to Harlow. I want to really experience the culture so I’m hoping tonight on the yacht that can happen because Brazil is a beautiful country and the culture here is amazing.

Kaylani: Kaylani sits down. This is so beautiful and relaxing.

Teairra: Teairra takes a seat. Yes, the scenery is definitely gorgeous!

Erica: Anyways, Teairra, Grace and Billie, how was y’all day? Did y’all enjoy the activity?

Grace: It was great, we had fun for the most part.

Billie: Fuck no. Dumb and dumber decided to launch an attack on me.

Erica: Erica jumps back. Wait, what? Who are dumb and dumber?

Teairra: It was really fun! we went to AquaRio.

Harlow: Who’s calling who dumb and dumber?

Grace: What’s a dumb and dumber?

Billie: My point! Billie laughs. Grace is dumb and Harlow is dumber.

Devyn: Grace, you look nice. I heard you’ve been talking shit. Shall we address that? What did you say was said Lani? That I’m sleeping with a nurse?

Grace: Grace rolls her eyes. What are you saying Devyn? Sorry?

Kaylani: Well Devyn, it was questioning your marriage and sexuality.

Harlow: Billie you are the dumbest of the dumber!

Devyn: Let’s get something straight right now on this damn boat. My sexuality is off the damn table for your little gossip sessions. What message are you sending to bisexual people with your constant questioning of my sexuality? Grow the fuck up Grace.

Erica: Erica makes a sad face. Aww.

Grace: Kaylani clearly didn’t tell you how it really transpired. We weren’t talking like that about you.

Erica: Kaylani, would you like to put it on the table, since you had so much to say about it?

Devyn: Talk about my marriage all you want, but my sexuality is none of your got damn business.

Grace: I don’t care what or who or when you sex Devyn. The thought of it makes me a little queasy.

Devyn: Then why were you talking about it, Grace? You’re fucking a porn star. Your opinions on anyone else’s sex doesn’t matter.

Grace: It’s more the discussion of you not being hot and cold.

Kaylani: Erica, you were there as well but since it’s a lot of talking behind each other’s back. Grace, I told Devyn you were talking about her sexuality and how she’s unhappy in her marriage, now that is the truth.

Grace: I wish I was a porn star! Grace laughs and clinks glasses with Teairra. You’re hot and cold, in and out, never around then around. It’s all just very confusing.

Erica: Erica laughs and sips drink while nodding. Clock it.

Grace’s Confessional: Devyn wants to attack, attack, attack but it’s just pointless at this point. No one’s interested anymore.

Devyn: If I’m hot, I’m “too hot”. If I’m cold, I’m “too cold”. I’m fucking human. All of you are hot and cold when it suits you.

Kaylani’s Confessional: Nothing I said was wrong in any way, I feel like if we’re all about sisterhood then everything needs to be shared with the group, I’m just spreading the message just like I would want someone to come to me with the same information.

Grace: No Devyn, you have a problem. And it’s not just me that’s clocked it. Don’t come at me when all you’ve done is talk badly about me.

Billie’s Confessional: Listen Devyn is on her own with this one. If I chime in, I’m damned and if I don’t, I’m damned so I’ll sit over here and drink my champagne and let the girls work.

Grace: So, I think I can say what I want to you. If you have a problem with it then too bad. But I’ll ask the questions.

Harlow’s Confessional: All that woman… what’s her name? Devyn! That’s how forgettable she is! But everything she says is just so gibberish! It’s just… nothing! It’s like in this world she can do anything and when someone does what she does, she gets all mad!

Devyn: I’m talking to you Grace. I know some don’t have anything better to do than talk about me.

Grace: Believe me, I have a lot of better things than talk about someone so insignificant to me

Devyn: The only problem I have is being a shitty friend to Teairra. Everything else is made up in your head.

Grace: No, I’m clear as day honey. You have problems and I hope you get them sorted. Teairra, good luck with that. Grace laughs.

Devyn: NEWS FLASH WE ALL HAVE PROBLEMS! Half this cast is in divorce court or headed there.

Teairra: Just a shitty friend?

Billie: I CAN’T take this back and forth anymore without addressing the elephant in the room. Clearly Amal isn’t here tonight. Has anyone talked to her? From my conversation with Grace Harlow and T today you all feel like Amal is the one who’s the bad guy in this movie? Why do you all think that?

Grace: You lose when you turn things physical, Billie. You shouldn’t condone anything like that.

Erica: Like I said to Amal, she was picking with Grace since last year. It was constant picking and even until yesterday she just kept putting things about her.

Billie: I don’t condone her behavior but I’m also not going to beat her while she’s down. You know first-hand how it feels when your life is exploited in than group.

Devyn: Amal is minding her selfcare. And since she’s not here to apologize or defend herself talking about her is a moot point. For once, even I agree with Billie.

Grace: Yeah, and I’m down too Billie, but you continue to beat me so to speak. So don’t act all holier than thou when it comes to Amal.

Erica: Erica puts her hand up. Like I was saying… Amal did apologize yesterday and was a bit distraught, so her not being here I believe is because she actually is a bit sincere.

Kaylani: Amal is going through a lot right now. I don’t think her actions need to be justified but she’s going through a lot.

Grace: I’m no angel, but the thing I said about her affair is true.

Devyn: Grace, shut up. I thought I was the only one with problems. People living in glass houses should have them shattered.

Billie: We will get to you and I later Grace. I think right now the main concern is you and Amal. It got physical and that’s something that we can just brush over.

Teairra: At first, I was very like oh Amal and Grace are having disagreements, then it turned into just constant BS with attacking Grace.

Grace: It’s because she knows I know her secrets.

Billie: Erica and Teairra, would you not beat Grace’s ass if she said in front of this group that you were having an affair?

Devyn: Yes, they would.

Harlow: Amal just constantly bullies and attacks Grace and uses her problems as a way to attack her!

Erica: I would have and I would have beat Amal’s ass for running around gossiping about me all year as well.

Devyn: Chill with that bully word. Grace is a grown ass woman.

Billie: Harlow, I think Grace can speak for herself. She’s 65 years young! She doesn’t need a mouthpiece.

Harlow: Here’s the thing! Amal is saying so much shit about Grace it’s astronomical!

Grace: Billie, just rest those lips before they burst. Is Amal paying your bills or something? It’s weird. You’re her warrior. No one can disagree with you, it’s so annoying

Teairra: Well absolutely, but isn’t it the truth?

Erica: Devyn, you’ve been doing the same thing to Teairra all year so of course you’re so Team Amal on this.

Billie: I am just trying to be a friend to her! I’m sorry I’m not a yes man to you Grace like Harlow clear is.

Harlow: Oh my god, shut the fuck up!

Grace: You’re seriously so deranged

Harlow: You are acting like Grace doesn’t have a voice and I have to stick up for her when Amal hasn’t said shit and you’re the only one speaking up for her! It’s really weird how you guys always seem to contradict yourselves!

Grace’s Confessional: Billie cannot be reasoned with, it’s like there’s no light on. Hello are you there? It’s me a normal conversation? Come join me.

Billie: Billie points at Grace and Harlow. Both of you shut the fuck up! One of you has a kid that doesn’t speak to you and the other has a jewelry business where you put two paper clips together and call it jewelry. I’m so sick of you two trying to paint me out to be the bad guy!

Grace: I’d love to see Amal sit here and talk about her issues you both keep talking about.

Harlow: Don’t speak ill of my business! That is off LIMITS!

Billie: Harlow you can’t even say a jewelry piece! That’s why you’ve had to relaunch it TWICE now.

Harlow: I BET YOU DONT EVEN OWN REAL JEWELRY! It was a new collection you idiot!

Erica: Erica slams her hand on the table. ENOUGH! If you ladies are going to have a conversation, have a conversation but we not doing all THIS! 1 on 1 or shut the fuck up about the topic.

Billie: Just because I live within my means doesn’t mean I can’t afford anything. I’m sorry everything I own doesn’t belong to the bank.

Grace: Here comes the violin…

Billie: Grace, why are you so pissed at me?

Grace: You’re so predictable. Because you’re a bitch, that’s why.

Devyn: Harlow’s jewelry boarders on costume jewelry. I gave it to my daughter. It’s fake.

Billie: That’s not why Grace and you and I both know it. Why don’t you tell the ladies the real reason why you don’t like me?

Harlow: It’s real babes! Bring it to the pawn shop they’ll be offering MILLIONS for my jewelry! You’ve probably never seen a million in your life so I bet you’d take it Devyn!

Devyn: Harlow, there’s nothing wrong with being the second coming of Claire’s.

Harlow: I don’t know what’s a Claire’s! What is that?! Seems like you’d buy from there!

Devyn: Imagine questioning how much money I have? Devyn laughs. That’s your come back. Cute.

Harlow: And you calling my jewelry fake because you have no other way of retaliation? Cute.

Billie: Well, I did get a piece from your jewelry show appraised from a real jeweler. Billie pulls out paper from a jewelry report.

Harlow: Oh my god, what a joke!

Erica: Erica looks away from the conversation giggling. Oh god.

Harlow: You have enough time to go create a FAKE report about me? Shows a lot about you!

Billie: A fake report? Here bitch *throws report at Harlow* read it for yourself. You sell CUBIC Zirconias bitch!!

Harlow: Harlow gasps. WHAT IS THIS?! THIS IS SO BS! Have you ever seen a REAL report? It doesn’t look like this.

Devyn: Anyway… Teairra, I’m so sorry for what happened at the gala. You didn’t deserve that, and I’m truly sorry. I’m also sorry for what happened during our break in filming. I wasn’t a good friend when you needed me. I’m sorry.

Teairra: Teairra looks at Devyn and blinks. You’re apologizing?

Devyn: Yes, I am Teairra. I’m so sorry.

Erica: Erica makes a face. But just yesterday you said, her husband deserved it and that we were the miserable women’s club. Maybe we should have our tape recorder run that back, Kaylani hun, let Teairra know how Devyn said her husband deserved everything. Erica snaps at Kaylani.

Devyn: I’m not apologizing to her husband Erica. I’m apologizing to HER.

Kaylani: Girl, don’t snap at me, I am not your husband.

Erica: Her husband is her life partner, that’s an attack on her as well.

Devyn: And would you shut up for once? Let me own my shit. Damn.

Harlow’s Confessional: I’m not surprised Devyn is a two-faced bitch. Look at her friends!

Erica: You can’t own it if you’re still being shitty the fuck?

Teairra: Teairra’s eyes widen. But my husband is also a part of me, so that’s still a half assed apology. And why am I even being a topic still?

Kaylani: Clearly Devyn is trying to apologize for everything what’s not clicking.

Devyn: If apologizing to your husband will put this behind us, I’m willing to do that. I hate being at odds with you. Devyn tears up. I’m really sorry. You didn’t deserve that. Especially after what Erica did to you last year.

Teairra: Honestly, you can take your apology and shove it up your ass you apologized to me multiple times and it got worse every time you apologized. You can save the crocodile tears.

Erica: Why is Erica in this?

Devyn: That’s fine Teairra. I am sorry. Someone doesn’t have to accept the apology.

Devyn’s Confessional: I don’t apologize often. When I do, I mean it. Teairra doesn’t have to accept. Yes, that hurts, but such is life.

Kaylani: You started this… that’s why.

Erica: You zip it. I didn’t start anything.

Teairra: How did Erica start it?

Erica: Speak up, Kaylani.

Kaylani: Girl, you gonna learn about that.

Erica: Oh, now she can’t talk? You had a WHOLEEE lot to say yesterday though.

Kaylani: First Erica brought something up to the table after Devyn is clearly trying to apologize for everything, it’s not the right place or time.

Teairra: I mean everything else is put on the spot in this group why not let it be known. Considering it was recent? Like literally the other day.

Erica: It’s the right place and time because I said it was. Let’s put EVERYTHING on the table then! Kaylani, how do you know Jordan?

Kaylani: Devyn was angry, and yes Teairra, you have the right to know but she’s clearly trying to apologize for everything so let he do just that mad write her wrong. Kaylani turns to Erica. Jordan is a nice guy who reached out to have a conversation with me that’s all I’m gonna say on that.

Erica: That’s all?

Kaylani: That’s all you need to know boo.

Grace’s Confessional: Kaylani is quiet as a mouse when the tables are turned.

Teairra’s Confessional: Kaylani is lying through her veneers right now, for somebody who likes to spread everyone else’s business, let’s put it ALL on the floor.

Teairra: So, you’ve never been in hotels with Jordan?

Kaylani’s Confessional: I don’t have to tell that chatter box anything me and Jordan have had conversations about it.

Billie: HOTELS? Like what do you mean, Teairra? I’m confused.

Kaylani: He’s been in hotels that me and my husband on with his lady that’s how we know each other.

Erica: So, you’re a swinger? Because Amal is his lady.

Kaylani: No honey, but maybe if you and your soon to be ex did maybe it would have lasted a little longer.

Teairra: It was definitely more than just what you’re implying Kaylani! Do you want to tell everybody? Or should I?

Devyn: Again, why are we talking about Amal who isn’t here? Don’t you have a life to talk about Erica?

Kaylani: It’s not that’s all, I’m not here to discuss what conversation me and Jordan may have talked about. Why don’t you ask Jordan for yourself?

Erica: Erica smirks and sips wine ignoring the background noise. Fuck it, Kaylani you’ve been fucking on Jordan. Did you tell Amal something that?

The camera pans around as the group gasps and are shocked…

Erica: Since you like to run back everyone’s business. Let’s talk about YOUR business

Teairra: And there it is…

Kaylani: Kaylani stands up. Girl, don’t ever put that kinda dirt on my name!

Erica: Don’t stand up. Erica sips her drink, laughing. You’re a slut. You’re a whore and I see why Devyn wants your company.

Billie: Let’s not get physical ladies…

Kaylani: I will not do this with you and let you lie on my good name!

Billie: OH MY GOD ERICA!

Teairra’s Confessional: When Kaylani was really intoxicated, she did admit to us that she knew Jordan and they definitely were MORE than friends, I see why she’s a little bit more closed off because honey…

Billie: Billie walks up to the captain. Hey sir, can we turn this ship around. We are about to have someone overboard if we don’t get back to land soon!

Erica’s Confessional: Kaylani wanted to be SOOO messy but hun lets own your mess. The same girl you’re trying to befriend, is the same girl whose man you’re running around with. Now check that.

Kaylani: Let me sit down, but like I said you will not lie on my name, I have a husband and a family.

Erica: Erica stands up clapping. KAYLANI IS A WHORE! KAYLANI IS A WHORE! Erica dances and walks to the front of the boat.

Billie: Erica, please just sit down.

Kaylani’s Confessional: Okay I’ll admit maybe me and Jordan did something but that’s none of anyone’s business.

Billie’s Confessional: God, I love Erica, but she’s acting like she’s making her debut on Broadway with all these theatrics. I guess hanging around me can teach you a thing or two.

Kaylani: Kaylani stands up. Bitch, I will flip this table and show you how it gets down in Compton forreal!

Erica: Erica twerks a little. Kiss my ass bitch! Erica struts away as the yacht reaches the port.

Billie: Listen guys, we are back to the port. I say we table this conversation for another time. Maybe next time we are around Amal, we can talk about this.

Teairra: Teairra gets up. Well, it looks like this ship is sailing!

Kaylani: DON’T EVER! CLAP YOUR HAND IN MY FACE. you will be thrown in that ocean… yeah, walk away just like your husband walked away from that dwindling marriage. Kaylani laughs.

As the Ladies leave the yacht, the camera pans out as we see a shot of the Rio skyline as the sun sets down into the ocean. We hear fun music as the scene transitions and we watch Kaylani, Harlow, Billie, and Erica walking along a crowded Rio street…

Kaylani’s Confessional: Whew, after last night debacle between me and erica i am going to act like the lady of Twitter I am, and not the lady of Compton today. That beast will not get a rise out of me today and in honor of her spreading misinformation I wore my “I’m good clickbait” shirt in honor of her being just like the fake blogs spreading misinformation.

Billie: Billie stands there awkwardly. Well ladies… this pub looks fun! Should we go in there? And no violence today! Remember street fights are illegal in Brazil!

Harlow: I did not know that. Harlow chuckles.

Erica: No Compton today hun. Erica swings her bag back in Kaylani’s face and walks inside of the pub.

Erica’s Confessional: Imma keep it cute and classy today because I don’t wanna go to Brazilian jail, no ma’am.

Kaylani: Yes, I’m definitely ready to have some drinks. Yeah, do it now cause you know I can’t handle that ass right now.

Billie: Billie walks into the pub and is greeted by carnival dancers. Oh wow, this is fabulous! Not your typical pub!

Billie’s Confessional: You know what else is not typical Harlow’s jewelry business!

Billie: Harlow, you better move them stiff bones!

Harlow: My bones can move as much as yours!

Erica: Erica starts dancing with the dancers. Let’s get some shots!

Billie: Billie scoots over to the bars. This is a really fun and lively place! Should we all do a patron shot to get the night started?

Harlow: I think we should!

Erica: Round of Patron for the ladies!

Billie: Kaylani, you better not get too loose girlfriend. You know what happens when you get too drunk…

Billie’s Confessional: She usually takes someone back to her place… man or woman. Billie laughs.

Erica: Yes girl, let’s keep it nice and tight!

Billie: Erica and you are going to keep your hands to yourself today. I know you like to get fiesty on that patron!

We then watch as shots play of the women downing shots, dancing, and having fun for a while as dance music plays in the background…

Billie: Harlow, why can’t you always be like this? This is the Harlow I like and love.

Harlow: This is me!! Harlow starts flipping her hair.

Erica: Erica hugs both Billie and Harlow. I want you girls to get ALONG FOR ME!

Kaylani: I definitely needed this. Harlow, you seem to be so free and not tied to any strings.

Billie: Billie downs another shot and slurs. To Harlow’s JEWELRY BUSINESS! WOOOO. I’m sorry I had someone look at your jewelry to tell me it’s fake!

Harlow: YOU BETTER BE!

Billie: Billie leans over to Erica. Do you have proof of Kaylani and Jordan being together?

Erica: Erica whispers to Billie. Of course, I do. Not only did Kaylani tell Teairra and I. But there are also some images floating around. Kaylani, is swinging like sexually amusing? Or does it ever get complicated?

Billie: Billie looks at Erica in shock. Kaylani, you TOLD Teairra and Erica you slept with Jordan!?

Kaylani: Erica, I don’t know what you’re talk about. If you call kissing swinging, then so be it I’m just having fun that’s all. But also, Erica, the many drinks that you been drinking is it that many problems going on at home?

Harlow: What’s happening ladies! Let’s have fun!

Erica: I don’t have any issues with liquor. Maybe my husband but clearly you have problems in that department as well. He clearly doesn’t please you… sexually.

Kaylani’s Confessional: Bitchhh, I am drunk as hell, I don’t know what I’m saying I’m just having fun. And if you wanted to know yes me and Jordan had a little fun in Vegas at one of hotels, but who’s business is that exactly?

Kaylani: Yes, and clearly you don’t please your husband sexually hence why he’s with the other WOMAN. Kaylani laughs hitting Erica with her hip as they dance.

Erica’s Confessional: Kaylani, is finally admitting that she messed around with Jordan but the thing is… Amal is with Jordan and ALLLL this time Kaylani has been laughing and smiling in her face. Let’s talk about Two Faced.

Erica: Erica hits Kaylani’s hip back. You love this waterfall baby, that’s why he tryna get back. Erica looks at Billie. So, was that diamond really fake?

Billie: Yes, it was. Why would I bring a fake report, Harlow started and I finished. Plus, I had heard rumors swirling that this business was just for her to hide money in her divorce.

Harlow: Harlow turns around and walks over to Billie and Erica. I heard my name!

Erica: Is somebody setting you up or something? Oh my god.

Harlow: Excuse you Billie?! Don’t fucking say shit that’s not true!

Kaylani: So, how much was her jewelry actually worth Billie?

Billie: I’m just repeating what I heard Harlow!

Harlow: Well then, I’m here to deny it! I’m not a con-woman!

Billie: I think the Diamond appraised for about $100.

Harlow: That’s a lie! Why do you have to dig at my business! Worry about yours!

Billie: Look Harlow, I don’t know who you buy your diamonds from but I would start outsourcing somewhere else.

Harlow: You went to a fake jeweler! Or whatever! Maybe you photoshopped it! Cause that paper you pulled up is not how papers look like! My jewelry is 100% real! You can’t relate!

Erica: Harlow, is somebody setting you up?

Billie: Billie pulls out a Jeweler’s business card. Here’s his number. Some of the ladies in this group use him.

Kaylani: I hope that’s not true. How much are you selling your jewelry for?

Harlow’s Confessional: These women do anything to tear anyone down for their entertainment.

Billie: The website says $500 for a necklace? Is that right Harlow…

Harlow: Yes, because I put real jewelry!

Billie: I found the same necklace on SHEIN for $24.99… so are you like buying from a wholesaler or what?

Harlow: Oh my god, you’re such a joke! I make my designs from scratch so don’t say that I’m copying designs from a website you probably shop at! Cause whatever your wearing right now… seems like SHEIN!

Billie: Harlow you’ve literally taken me to your factory and there’s no one working…. Like ever. And Harlow you are wearing ENDI. Where’s the F?

Kaylani’s Confessional: I may be seeing double right now but damn this tea is keeping me all the way together my cup is surely running over.

Harlow: It’s literally right there! Are you blind? There’s always people working!

Billie: Girl, I think that patron is getting to you! There’s no damn F to the ENDI on your shirt

Erica: Ladies, Ladies!

Harlow: I THINK YOUR EYESIGHT IS GETTINNG WORSE AS YOU AGE!! Harlow points her finger at Billie. DON’T SPEAK ILL OF MY BUSINESS! FIND A REAL JOB INSTEAD OF USING YOUR FREE TIME TO PHOTOSHOP FAKE SHIT!

Harlow’s Confessional: If I’m being honest, I feel like Billie just sits in her living room and talks to herself on what next fake accusation she should make up about us ladies.

Erica: Harlow no! Erica grabs Harlow pulling her away. We having fun, we having fun!

Harlow: She’s ruining my fun! I’m not going to let that bitch try to tear down my business and reputation with utter lies! Do you see how much of a bitch she is?!

Erica: Erica hugs Harlow and dances. We’re in Rio! If I can ignore big nose over there, you can play nice too. It’s okay!

Erica’s Confessional: Being caught in the middle of Billie and Harlow was not on my bingo card. These girls have been TEARING each other apart and to think Billie was the one who wanted me to give Harlow a chance. I can’t!

Erica: Listen, you know what’s true and what’s not. And your sales speak for itself. It’s good!

Harlow: SHE WANTS TO TEAR DOWN MY LIFE! SHE’S DONE IT WITH GRACE AND NOW ME?!

Billie: I don’t want to ruin your life HARLOW I’m just laying out there what the streets are saying!

Harlow: I don’t even want to respond to you. I wanna go!

Billie: And the streets are someone from this group!

Harlow: Well, I better find out who it is so I can call my lawyers! And we’ll take it from there.

Erica: No more Patron Billie! Its time to go!

Billie: Look Harlow, I don’t want to make you cry that’s not my goal for tonight but I’m just trying to be honest with you.

Harlow: Well, why are people spread LIES about me on their free time? Once I find out who they are, I will be taking the proper action against them.

Billie: Everything in the dark comes to light. That’s all I’ll say.

Harlow: Harlow rolls her eyes. Is the Taxi here yet?! I need to talk to my children.

As the camera pans out from the pub as Harlow walks out, visibly upset, before the scene quickly transitions as we see all the Ladies, except Devyn, getting off the bus and making their way to a jeep, as the camera pans out to the beautiful rainforest. We watch them all load up into the Jeep, before it takes off into the rainforest, to show them many of Rio’s beautiful creatures…

Amal’s Confessional: I haven’t seen all the girls together since our first night where things went a little wild. Grace and I have agreed to leave each other alone, so I’m hoping she’s passed the message onto Harlow & Co and we can just enjoy ourselves.

Billie: I hope one of these orangutans gets one of you bitches! Billie laughs.

Grace: OH, IT’S A BUMPY STREET!

Billie: Billie bounces from her seat. I haven’t been thrown around like this since a few months ago!!

Erica: Erica points at the sloth. Oh my god! How did Kaylani get out the jeep!

Teairra’s Confessional: Riding through the wilderness is actually peaceful and everyone seems to be getting along right now! And I”m seeing a lot of animals that look like some of the ladies like this is just… Teairra laughs. A lot.

Billie: Oh, it looks like we’re making it to our stop! Let’s have some lunch girls.

The camera then shifts as we see the Ladies taking a seat around a lunch table set up in an enclosure overlooking the rainforest as the scene continues…

Billie: Whew ladies, that was a bumpy ride! Amal, I’m glad you are with us today!

Amal: Thank you my friend. I really didn’t know if you guys would want me around after everything that happened the other night.

Erica: Yes, we all had a lot to say about your absence yesterday but it’s good to see your face.

Billie: Well, some of these ladies didn’t and still don’t but you know I figured you had some things to say!

Grace’s Confessional: We’re waiting to hear your excuses Amal, c’mon, spit it out. Get those tears dropping.

Amal: Amal nods. I definitely do. Firstly, I want to apologize to Grace again. She and I met up yesterday and I apologized to her in private then but I think it’s only right, she hears it in the group. I was absolutely wrong for throwing the glass of wine in your face. With that said, we have both agreed we aren’t going to be friends. As for everyone else, I want to say how sorry I am that I took this group of ladies to such a low place by acting like a fool. I’m very sorry for declassing this group of friends and I’ll never do it again. And that’s a promise.

Kaylani: It’s okay Amal, you had a slip up it’s understandable, I’ve have had that plenty of times.

Teairra: Well, the group was never the classiest of the bunch so I wouldn’t say you declassed it but it was crazy.

Billie: Aww Amal, I knew you didn’t mean to do it!! Your hands just slipped and you blacked out! As for declassing this group. Right now the bar is set in hell so I don’t think you did anything worse than some of the ladies amongst us.

Grace: It’s good that you’re aware and you’ve apologized.

Billie’s Confessional: Amal has a good heart and she’s a good person. Some people will cause you to go off course sometimes. So, I’m not surprised Grace was the one on the receiving end of Amal’s discourse.

Erica: Like I said before and I said this again, I saw that you were actually sincere when talking to you in the art museum. We all have our moments, if you two are done then lets dead this situation because if they’re not talking about it anymore, none of us should be.

Grace: Let’s just enjoy the rest of this trip.

Harlow’s Confessional: I’m not trying to sound rude but I quite frankly do not care. I think she’s just faking it. I don’t think she means it.

Billie: I would like to have a good rest of our excursion. So, I am glad that you two agreed to move on in your own paths. Harlow are you good to let the issue go now?

Amal: Thank you ladies! I’m officially done with this back and forth with Grace and I want to enjoy my time with you all in Rio! I feel like I’ve missed so much. What’s been going on these last few days?

Harlow: Huh? What happened?

Amal: I apologized to Grace as well as the whole group.

Harlow: Oh, that’s amazing.

Amal: Are you and I good?

Harlow: Let’s see how the wind blows, Amal.

Billie: I Can Tell you Amal we went on a pub crawl with Harlow, Erica and Kaylani and it was a fun time. Probably the most fun I’ve had on this trip so far has been drinking the booze here!

Harlow: I don’t remember anything at the pub.

Billie: Probably because you don’t want to talk about what’s out there. Billie smirks.

Erica: Fun until you two… Erica points at Harlow and Billie. Started screaming.

Harlow: Are you saying something, Billie? When did I start screaming? Did I?!

Teairra: They started screaming at each other again?

Billie: Oh god not another pretend amnesia moment from Harlow.

Erica: Harlow the last time you screamed that high was when you called me a bitch last year.

Kaylani: I don’t remember but I”m guessing it was something. I do remember Erica drinking a lot, that’s all.

Billie: Harlow just is not being truthful in this group.

Harlow: I literally do not remember anything. Billie, are you?

Erica’s Confessional: She was screeching. At the top of her lungs. I had to clear all the ladies out the pub expeditiously.

Grace: She never is.

Billie: I told you Harlow I CAN’T talk about my legal situation because it’s a legal matter now and NDA’s have been put in place so.

Grace: But you can talk about other people’s legal issues? Got it.

Billie: Grace, for someone who’s got a list of lawsuits you shouldn’t be speaking right now.

Grace: Whatever lips.

Billie: Whatever jailbird.

Erica: I have to ask Harlow, what’s going on with the whole diamond situation. Were you scammed? Did you know they were fake?

Harlow: See now It’s coming back! They were not fake! It’s stupid really.

Billie: But the jewels were fake. Amal was there with me when I went to the jeweler!

Amal: What diamonds?

Erica: I’m just going based off the evidence that Billie presented.

Harlow: I have my own jewelers and they determine my prices.

Billie: You are running a PYRAMID scheme Harlow. I’ll just say it since it’s running through the rumor mill in Twitter.

Harlow: A PYRAMID SCHEME?!

Erica’s Confessional: I’m hoping Harlow just says she was scammed at this point because now you’re looking like a Luci 2.0 and you might end up being in prison bitch.

Harlow: Now don’t fucking accuse me of bullshit! Who’s been telling you this shit?! Cause I want to know!

Grace: She makes it up Harlow. Like she does everything else, she’s a walking lie box.

Harlow: If I find out that any ONE of you guys said this shit, including you Billie, I will be taking the proper action. Because this is defamation.

Amal: Did she say pyramid scheme?

Grace: Shove a $20 in and she’ll lie for you

Teairra’s Confessional: What’s a pyramid scheme?! Somebody hand me my phone so I can google.

Erica: Oh my god… you don’t threaten friends with lawyers Harlow! Not cool!

Harlow: Billie, you really are so unemployed! You don’t have a life except creating FALSE shit to ruin someone else’s life!

Billie: I don’t reveal my sources but maybe you should lean off the vodka and stop talking to people when you drink.

Harlow: I don’t drink vodka!

Billie: I have a job, and several sources of income. I don’t have to be in a factory putting two paper clips together and call it jewelry to have an income.

Amal’s Confessional: For like 6 seconds there, I thought we could enjoy the rest of the trip but now we’re at fake jewels, pyramid schemes and defamation… Great.

Grace: Harlow’s jewels are gorgeous.

Kaylani: Is the jewelry custom made because there was a site with the same jewelry for cheaper?

Billie: She wholesales the jewelry and calls it her collection!

Harlow: I literally have my OWN sketches of my jewelry! Do you want me to bring up my sketches? Cause I will! Don’t you DARE accuse me of false shit!

Erica: You ladies are scaring the animals.

Grace: You can’t say something like that Billie without proof. That’s so wrong.

Harlow: I just can’t! You guys have to continuously gang up on me it’s stupid! You pulled that shit out of your ass just because I came for your friend Billie. I don’t know what that screams, but to me, it’s screaming retaliation done WRONG.

Amal: Wait, what are you talking about? Which friend?

Harlow: Who else would I be talking about?!

Amal: So, me?

Billie: Billie laughs. I think in due time everything will be reveled about miss Harlow.

Grace: When you pay your photoshop guy.

Harlow: I’m not like you and pull shit out of my ass randomly.

Billie: No Photoshop over here! I’m not like you Grace and doctor documents to get out of lawsuits.

Amal: It’s fine if it was but just say you were talking about me. Don’t beat around the bush.

Harlow: If that pyramid scheme rumor is true, I know you wouldn’t have said it on this trip! You would’ve brought it up in Twitter! But guess what, you decided to take that shit out of your ass on this trip! You are just fake Billie! Your lips are fake, your boobs are fake, you are 100% fake!

Billie: I decided since you wanted to start, I’ll finish it.

Harlow: Fake, fake, fake! It’s called lying because you’re bored. Get a HOBBY!

Amal: I think enough is enough.

Grace: Get a life more like.

Harlow: Maybe being a swinger like Kaylani would help you.

Kaylani: Kaylani laughs. Now why am I in it?

Billie: Wow Harlow, you are just reaching. Did I hit a nerve?

Harlow: I’m just saying maybe Billie needs to become a swinger because she clearly cannot find a hobby! Fuck off. I’m done listening to that trout bitch.

Teairra: Oh my god?

Billie: At least my lips don’t look like a monkey’s ASSHOLE!

Harlow: Harlow blows Billie kisses. IT’S 100% REAL!!

Billie: Maybe in utopia BITCH! I can’t stand to be here another minute with this fake pyramid scheming bitch.

Erica: Can I get a to-go box? I never finish a meal with these ladies. Erica looks around for the staff.

Amal: Amal walks over to Billie and grabs her by the arm. Let’s go! This isn’t going to go anywhere good!

Harlow: She is so delusional I love it!

Billie: I’m ready to get out of her now before I drench her in wine to fix that leathery skin of hers!

Harlow: I think you’d need the wine more because clearly the decaying skin of yours needs some nutrients!

As Billie and Amal walk off, the screen fades to black, before we transition several hours later as all the Ladies are seen standing in their lobby, before being led out to the streets, where they have a carnival parade to join as they walk towards their final dinner of the trip

Amal: This is so cute!

Kaylani: I should’ve worn my carnival fit!

Kaylani’s Confessional: I’m feeling festive, I am excited to see the street carnival tonight and the girls hopefully everything goes as planned for the last night here but I doubt that.

The Ladies all make their way through the carnival, dancing along with the beautiful people in bright colorful outfits, as they all enjoy themselves and let loose…

Billie’s Confessional: Everyone I turn there’s an ass, you look to your right there’s someone twerking and you look to your left there’s someone giving a lap dance. The dancers in Rio are next level! I love it here.

We then watch as the Ladies reach the Christ the Redeemer statute, where we see a beautifully set table where the Ladies will be having dinner tonight. We see them each taking their seats as the carnival continues around them, but an awkward tension begins to fill the air…

Billie: How did we get here ladies? Billie looks around the group. We are so divided.

Harlow: Wonder how…

Teairra: Teairra shrugs. I wish I knew; it’s been all types of twists and turns.

Grace: Well, let’s make a pact tonight, under the Christ himself to not lie

Amal: I personally don’t have any issues with any of you. I know Grace and I have been going at it, but I feel like we’ve decided to kind of just leave things where they are. But from my vantage point, it seems like Harlow is the one with the issues.

Harlow: I mean everyone somehow hates me in this group for no reason… Harlow shrugs and looks around.

Amal: Let’s not be a victim. Let’s not be a victim.

Devyn: Harlow, if you minded your own business, you wouldn’t be so annoyingly disliked!

Amal’s Confessional: I didn’t realize Harlow was a synonym for victim. The more you learn…

Harlow: Devyn, why are you talking? Stay out of it babe.

Grace: Amal, I know you didn’t just say the word victim.

Billie: I don’t hate Harlow, she just has shady business like her friend Grace!

Teairra’s Confessional: Now Harlow … we’re being cordial for the sake of Rio but no reason? C’mon, let’s get real.

Amal: Maybe you’re hearing is off my darling I said, “let’s not be a victim.”

Devyn: Harlow, get into it. That’s the problem. Pick a struggle.

Harlow: Devyn seriously stay out of it sometimes you blend in the table like these chameleons in the wild.

Erica: Let’s not all pile up on her at this table now.

Amal: Fair enough. I personally don’t have an issue with Harlow. I know she spoke quite negatively of me which resulted in her and Billie getting into an argument.

Billie: I hate how Harlow doesn’t stand on her own. She has issues with people based off other people’s experiences and not her own experiences.

Amal: So, I just want to know what was said…

Devyn: Not Erica talking about not piling on someone. Girl pot meet kettle.

Billie: Teairra, don’t you have a problem with her to?

Harlow: I can’t believe you guys are saying this… seriously.

Erica: Why is that thing talking? You’re not even relevant enough to talk about. Stay quiet at the end of the table, hun.

Harlow: I do not have one word to say to any of you guys at this table except for one person.

Grace’s Confessional: Billie has an issue with Harlow for something she does to everyone at all times constantly, it’s wild.

Amal: She can’t back it up. That’s the problem. If you’re going to bring it up then back it up!

Devyn: Whew chile. Can we move on from the mouse that finally found her voice to Erica deflecting and getting into everyone’s business to cover for her clusterfuck of a life? Just wondering.

Erica: Erica turns my head to the end of the table towards Devyn. You got something to say to me, bitch?

Harlow: You wanna call me a mouse? Okay then let’s call you furniture! You just sit there!

Erica: No, she’s right!

Devyn: I said what I had to say bitch.

Erica: And what did you say? Bring it up … Erica taps on table. Let’s go.

Devyn: Your life is on fire like Luci’s restaurant and you act like you business is minding everyone else’s.

Erica: She’s been a part of this group and constantly flopping in this group. Flop, flop, flop. Just like those saggy ass titties. FLOP! Baby, my business is out THERE and I’m handling it. You’re the one going on every floor of your hospital looking for a carpet to munch.

Grace: Okay E, take a breath.

Amal: She’s been around here for years and always will so don’t be dismissive of her and tell her to sit and be quiet. It’s not right.

Devyn: Girl, I don’t need the women at that hospital.

Erica: I’m calm but she wanted this so let her get it.

Devyn: That’s all you got? Your husband belongs to the streets of Twitter and you want to talk about my sex life.

Erica: What can say about me? My husband cheated? Congrats! Erica claps. And your husband still a crackhead bitch. He should be 60 feet from hospital premises at all times. Lord knows he might relapse off those pills.

Grace: Everyone’s got or had marriage issues Devyn you shouldn’t shame someone for it.

Devyn: My husband was never on crack and if he was it would hold more value than that fakeness on your hand.

Erica: You can’t even keep up with your stories. It’s all for show and you’re flopping tremendously.

Amal’s Confessional: I preferred the gangbang on Harlow. This is just nasty,

Erica: You don’t want this work, bitch.

Devyn: Erica, why are you name calling and deflecting instead of addressing your husband love child? Why don’t you come with full honesty?

Amal: The two of you just need to stop.

Erica: What child? Cite it!

Erica’s Confessional: Devyn wanted the smoke and bitch here it is… She’s desperately trying to come for me and it just always fall flat. Stay in line heathen, the big dogs are talking now.

Grace: I want to know about you two though, you’ve got on a bit on this trip… Grace points at Harlow and Teairra.

Teairra’s Confessional: Do I feel bad that Erica is tearing Devyn and her husband apart? Absolutely not, I mean she had a lot to say about my husband it’s only fair.

Harlow: I was shocked we actually remained cordial on this trip.

Teairra: I actually am as well, we were almost choking each other out not too long ago, I think it was all a misunderstanding!

Amal: How did you guys resolve everything? Who admitted to being a liar?

Teairra: My issues were minor that turned into another thing when I was called a “jealous bitch.”

Harlow’s Confessional: I think that this trip showed that me and Teairra could possibly make up. We actually got along really well, like we used to. I missed it.

Harlow: And I apologize for that Teairra. It was all in the moment and like, I did feel you were ignoring me for a bit. And if there is a true reason, I am sorry.

Devyn: Glad Teairra is able to put some things behind her.

Teairra: And I can apologize for the way I reacted towards you, I actually don’t have a huge issue with you because you didn’t decide to smear my name around any chance you got.

Devyn’s Confessional: Oh, Teairra accepts and gives apologies. Wow. Who knew.

Harlow: I really just want to move on with you. I really missed our friendship and this trip really reminded me of it.

Amal: This is laughable.

Teairra: We can move on! We’ve already been having a good time here so I think this is a good restart.

Billie: Amal, I just laugh at the fakery in this group. It’s really laughable.

Devyn: Are these cameras recording an acting reel?

Erica’s Confessional: Honestly Harlow & Teairra’s problem was literally about nothing? So I’m just glad that they can put this behind them and all 3 of us can finally go out.

Teairra: Amal, what was that?

Harlow: You guys are so jealous! Maybe you are the jealous bitches!

Amal: I just think Harlow’s apology is laughable.

Devyn: No one is jealous of you.

Billie: I think Harlow is just trying to get the heat off her ass so of course she was going to apologize to Teairra.

Grace: Like your apology to me Amal.

Amal: She’s had an issue with me, she’s had an issue with Devyn, with Billie, with Erica and with you Teairra.

Harlow: So, I can’t miss a friend and reconnect with them? Ok girl bye!

Amal: Grace as with every other facet of your life, no one at this table is paying attention to you.

Teairra: Well, I think she’s apologized to both Erica and I.

Billie: You can miss a friend, it’s just convenient. Especially when you were laughing at Devyn leaking that Donte got fired from the hospital. Teairra WAKE up. That girl is not your friend.

Devyn: And she was.

Erica: You laughed at that??

Harlow: Billie, keep lying! That is such a fucking LIE!

Billie: You were over there laughing hysterically, you didn’t care to be a friend to her then!

Amal: You were laughing sweetie.

Harlow: Here comes the Billie Train of Lies! Another train has shot out of Billie’s ass!

Devyn: Billie isn’t lying.

Harlow: You three are the biggest bitches I’ve ever met! Seriously!

Billie: I wish I could shoot trains out of my ass but would be painful!

Teairra: Oh … why didn’t anyone tell me beforehand? because that situation wasn’t funny enough for anyone to let out a cackle at all.

Harlow: I feel like you guys meet up in a circle and discuss what to say about the Ladies next!

Grace: Of course they do Harlow. Three witches.

Amal: You think we meet up and talk about you? Girl, you’re as uninteresting as Jerika Wolfe.

Erica: If Teairra is okay with Harlow’s apology, why are still going on about this?

Billie: I figured you heard it, Teairra. We were all sitting there in a group.

Devyn: I didn’t know Teairra could accept apologies.

Teairra: Well, I’m not accepting yours, get over it already.

Billie: Okay since we are all going to be fake and accept apologies. I’m going to sit back and enjoy my dinner. So much for conflict resolution in this group.

Harlow: I don’t think you could accept a chair’s apology.

Teairra: You don’t have too. Free will girl.

Kaylani: Devyn was being genuine with you just saying.

Erica: Erica laughs. She’s one to talk about genuine.

Teairra: She apologized already and did even WORSE afterwards girl bye.

Billie: Grace, we push for the truth. And people like you run from it. So, of course, we won’t get any resolution. And now you’ve trained your lap dog Harlow to be the same way.

Devyn: I haven’t given many genuine apologies over the years, but I meant what I said to Teairra.

Harlow: Don’t call me a lap dog! I can speak for myself!

Grace: What do I run from Billie? Other than your stench of a perfume you seem to douse yourself in.

Amal then barks loudly at Harlow like a dog…

Harlow: Keep barking bitch! I can do it too! Ruff ruff!

Erica: Erica bursts out into laughter. I’m so sorry

Grace: Devyn’s got a lesbian doctor, Billie’s got no job and a lawsuit, and Amal has an affair. What do we have?

Billie: You run from your lawsuits. You run from this group, hell you even run from debt collectors!! I would say you are probably training for a 5K race with as much running as you do.

Erica: Wait, wait, wait! Erica looks over at Amal. I need some silence at the table, I have something to ask you. Since we’re being so genuine today.

Amal: Is this Jesus appropriate?

Erica: Absolutely. How long have you been seeing Jordan?

Amal: Amal raises her eyebrows. Excuse me?

Billie’s Confessional: You thought Amal flipping out the other day was bad. Wait til Erica drops this nugget of information.

Erica: How long have you and Jordan been together?

Grace: I can answer that, but I’ll wait to see if she lies.

Amal: I believe I answered this the other night Erica. We’ve been dating since about March.

Grace: But sleeping since when Amal?

Erica: I just want to fact check a couple of things. And it’s monogamous? Correct?

Amal: Excuse me Grace? Should you not be concerned with that 10 inch disco stick that you and countless other sluts and porn stars and strippers and prostitutes hop on every night?

Erica: Well Kaylani, since you have such a big mouth would you like to explain to Amal how you’ve been hotel hopping and sleeping with Jordan for about 5 months now? Or shall I bring up the conversation?

Billie: Oh my god.

Amal: Well, we are dating. As we all know, I’m still married. Separate but married

Billie: Erica, no you fucking did not.

Amal raises her eyebrows and looks over at Kaylani…

Erica: Let’s keep it real and genuine! Right?

Amal: Is this true?

Kaylani: Well, when me and Jordan met, I didn’t know him and Amal were a thing at the time but yes we did have something going on at a hotel in Vegas . THERE THE CAT IS OUT THE BAG!

Teairra: As a married woman!?

Devyn: Sweet Baby Jesus.

Erica: That’s odd… you said you and your husband were with him and his lady in a hotel.

Amal: I’d like if everyone can let me address Kaylani.

Devyn’s Confessional: Tyler and I are no longer the only Eskimo sisters.

Amal: Is this something that has continued since your Vegas romp?

Kaylani: Not ever since I found out you two were a thing no, but it was consistent yes.

Teairra’s Confessional: Well, Kaylani did say grace’s man was in her DM requests but seeing as though she’s a swinger maybe Grace should check her man’s phone more often! Cause she’s a super freak!

Amal: Okay, fair enough.

Erica: Erica laughs. You’re lying out your ass right now. You were just with him before this trip Am I lying right now, Teairra?

Harlow’s Confessional: First Kaylani french kissed Billie with the tongue, now she’s a swinger?! Lord! She needs to catch a break!

Teairra: Yes, she was.

Kaylani: I was not…you all love to make up stories I see.

Erica: And you sat here in Amal face this whole time knowing that you were fucking her man!

Kaylani: Where did you get this info from Erica?

Erica: You’re the one making up stories, first you were with Jordan, your husband, and Amal in a hotel, then y’all just kissed, now y’all were together.

Amal’s Confessional: I know these girls want a reaction out of me but no, no, no, they won’t be getting it tonight lovers. It’s still quite early days for Jordan and I plus I’m still legally married. I can’t be mad at him for exploring others when we haven’t had that discussion yet. We’ll see what happens when I get back home.

Amal: Sorry what?

Devyn: Erica should spend this much time investigating her husband’s sexcapades. Or participating. The obsession is weird.

Amal: Are you saying that we’ve been intimate?

Kaylani: Well honestly, Erica, it is none of your business you should really be trying to focus on your dwindling relationship with the secret child and stop worrying about anything that’s going on with me. And Amal let’s be honest… it happened.

Erica: Oop…you’re a swinger too?

Billie: Okay ladies, before we get kicked out of another restaurant. I want Harlow to give us a toast to end the trip.

Harlow: Harlow clinks her champagne. Okay ladies it’s getting to a point where you are talking too much! Let’s do a toast!

Amal: You lying ass slut bucket bitch! You and that filthy vagina have never been anywhere near me. I’m sick of this fucking tramp.

Kaylani: Oh, bitch please, I’m trying to let it remain a secret but don’t ever call me a LIAR BITCH.

Amal: First it was Grace’s man, then it’s my man and now it’s me? Her delusions need psychological treatment.

Kaylani: Says the girl with the most surgeries at the table!

Amal: You’re unwell bitch!

Billie: As much as I can’t stand the host right now. She’s trying to speak for once!

Erica: CHEERS TO SWINGERS! Erica puts her glass up.

Kaylani: Let me raise my glass unlike this bitch who can’t keep a glass in her hand. Kaylani raises her glass.

Harlow: Okay. Now that I have your attention, I just wanted to thank you guys for coming onto this trip that me and Erica had made! Thank you all for this trip and while some of you guys will remain as bitches, let’s toast to RIO!!

Grace: To Rio!

Erica: RIO!!!

Billie: Here’s to an end of another CRAZY TRIP with you bitches! TO RIOOO!

As the Ladies toast, and a tense music fills the air, the camera pans out to a shot of the Christ the Redeemer statue, as the scene and episode come to an end.

--

--

Ladies of Twitter

Ladies of Twitter is a fictional virtual reality series on Twitter. Catch up on all 15 seasons, and catch season 16’s new episodes Sundays & Wednesdays HERE!