Season 16, Episode 8: “Poco-No Way Forward”

Ladies of Twitter
36 min readJan 18, 2024

The episode begins as we see the main title pose fade from the screen, as dramatic music plays and we return to the riverbank where the Ladies are seated around a picnic table…

Grace: Ladies, if it’s okay I’d like to say something real quick…

Teairra: Oh — Teairra looks at Grace.

Billie: All rise for Queen Grace, she’s speaking Ladies!

Grace: Billie, I didn’t like how angry I got in the kayak. You’re a very good paddler despite those skinny arms, so I apologize for splashing you. I guess I’m just so confused why you all of a sudden have the hots for me and are like, coming for me and telling me I don’t belong at this table. I have a relationship with every single lady here. I just want to know why you’re all of a sudden so angry at me.

Grace’s Confessional: Don’t forget Billie and I spent a lot of time together off season, and we know each other and have confided in each other a LOT. like I said I could go there with her, but I don’t want to. I want to know what I could have done for her to be treating me this way.

Billie: Grace, I have told you it wasn’t that I had an issue with you. For me, why I said what I said was simply because I don’t see you try and engage with these ladies. You’ve been great to me, but I think you could try more with these girls. I know they’re not your regular sally, Suzan and Carol that you’re use to hanging with. I would just like to see you branch out of your busy life and engage with the girls. It just feels a bit elitist to me. Billie shrugs.

Devyn: Grace is trying.

Billie: Trust me I’m nowhere near some of these spring chickens, but I try and get to know them outside of these cameras! We are supposed to be sisterhood. That’s all.

Grace: What are you even talking about? I have relationships with everyone at this table. You’re talking out of your ass Billie and it’s not okay.

Tense music begins to play as the camera pans back and forth between Billie and Grace…

Billie: Let me ask the table, Grace. Raise your hand if any of you would hang out with Grace if we weren’t filming and you weren’t being paid to?

Grace: We’re not in kindergarten Billie. Stop acting like a fool.

Billie: I’m just asking. I’ll apologize if I’m wrong.

Grace: You are wrong.

The camera pans around the table as the group look at one another before Devyn is the first to raise her hand…

Devyn: Why the hell not.

Billie: Okay we got flip flop Devyn! Who else?

Grace: Stop trying to cause issues with me and the group. And STOP talking to the press about me.

Kaylani: Kaylani raises her hand as the camera pans out and shows Harlow also raising her hand. I kind of like Grace.

Teairra’s Confessional: Look, I like Grace! But we don’t have much in common, like she’s so sweet and we’re cordial but we don’t hang out often enough for me to answer that at the moment.

Devyn: Not Billie calling someone a flip flop when that’s what’s happening to her career behind the scenes.

Erica: I’m like so confused right now. Devyn, are you okay?

Billie: Devyn is mad I called her on her shit again. Just ignore her Erica.

Grace: So, what else do you have to say then Billie?

Devyn: I’m fine. Billie, is a backstabbing bitch who can’t be trusted. That’s all.

Amal: We don’t need to go there and talk about careers. We all have very successful careers.

Devyn: You didn’t call me on anything. You talked out of your flap Jack ass.

Teairra: Teairra chuckles. Backstabbing bitch…that’s the pot calling the kettle black. Teairra bites her burger.

Billie: Look Grace, I can be a bitch sometimes. So, I’ll apologize for saying you should’ve been fired. Maybe I should’ve said Devyn should be since all she contributes to this show is lies and bullshit.

Grace’s Confessional: Billie is just a bully. If it’s cool to hate someone then she’ll hate them, if the next day they’re the best, she loves them. It’s just gross

Erica: I’m just a bit confused Devyn because it seems as if you’ve been coming for your “friends” a-lot these past days. I’m like wow you started making digs at Billie after you two moved on, you have now attacked Teairra’s husband, someone who was supposed to be close with you and I just found out the other day that you’ve basically been trying to talk down on my friendship with Harlow as if I’m not a good friend.

Amal: Amal starts to choke on deer. Don’t…Amal coughs. Say… Amal coughs again. That Billie!

Grace: You know what, clearly I don’t need to sit here with all of you and take part, so I’ll just head back and take my old ass away so you can have some more fun without me holding you back.

Devyn: What do you contribute Billie? Please enlighten us.

Amal: Calm down Grace. We’re moving on from that.

Just then, Grace gets up and storms away into the woods as she is heard but not seen…

Grace: I’m so done with this, take my mic.

The camera then pans back over to the table where we see Billie and Devyn getting heated…

Billie: I’ve contributed a WHOLE lot more to this show than you have Devyn. I think everyone sees you as background noise.

Devyn: I haven’t said anything about your friendship with Harlow, Erica.

Harlow: Devyn, shut the fuck up yes you did!

Devyn: Matter of fact, I’m not sure I’ve uttered the name Harlow since we started filming.

Billie: Billie gasps. Okay Harlow!

Harlow: Devyn you are such a conniving evil little bitch! You keep lying! Just be quiet!

Devyn: Conniving? Nope. A bitch? Absolutely.

Harlow: A stupid one. Harlow rolls her eyes.

Erica’s Confessional: Harlow is not fucking around okay… is this still the little girl with no voice? Because she’s SPEAKING today hunny and I’m intrigued.

Teairra: Well, you did speak about my husband is what you did do and you expect me to just sweep it under the rug and be cool with you afterwards. I don’t know if you’re on medication or something but that’s crazy.

Devyn: Now to answer Erica’s question. I didn’t have a problem with Teairra until she started telling people I was ignoring her. Which is a lie.

Erica: Erica eats a fry. And I was crucified last year for speaking on Teairra’s husband so for you to do it, is a bit hypocritical.

Devyn: I let Billie back into my life and my children’s lives only to be stabbed in the back yet again.

Teairra: We could’ve talked out the ignoring situation, but you IMMEDIATELY brought up my husband. Like you were itching to say it.


Erica: Because she told you not to talk about Teairra’s husband? Hun, let’s act our age… please.

Devyn: No, I don’t expect that Teairra. At all. If I were you, I’d still be pissed. All I can do is apologize. I’m sorry.

Harlow’s Confessional: Devyn is a low-class bitch. She wants to lie about what she said, that’s NOT okay. And then you want to say that I’ve been invisible?! The only thing invisible is your stupid ass!

Devyn: Harlow, honey who are you? The extra has an opinion I don’t care about.

Teairra: Well, can you also clear up that you lied about him being fired? You’ve said some off the wall things.

Billie: I’ve had enough of you trying to make me out to be the bad friend. Maybe you shouldn’t say shit about people’s husbands, that’s character Assassination. I’m sorry Teairra is a better friend to me than you are, Devyn. I love your children so I won’t publicly destroy you, but let’s pipe down.

Harlow: Don’t call me an extra! You are a slowly decaying hag! That personality needs to decay!

Devyn: I wasn’t itching to say anything about your husband. I spent 18 months defending him and you. I’ve had plenty of time to talk if I wanted too. And Erica, with all due respect, Billie did more than that.

Teairra: You were defending me and now it’s you saying the same exact things as last year, like when are you bitches going to let it go. He’s cleared! He good!

Devyn: It was a joke. The murderer part anyway. I’m sorry.

Harlow: Devyn is being a two-faced bitch and I’m not putting up with that.

Teairra: A joke? Teairra laughs. Oh, she’s losing it.

Devyn: Billie, we don’t have to ever be friends. Now Harlow, why would I care about you and Erica being friends? Why would I care about you being friends with anyone?

Erica: Erica giggles. This is mess.

The camera pans to Amal who makes a face as she watches Harlow get angrier…

Amal’s Confessional: Not Harlow getting some base in that voice. I’m not happy that it’s being directed to my girl Dev, but who would’ve thought we could’ve gotten her to raise that whisper to a roar.

Billie: That’s not what I want but if that’s what you want Devyn, be my guest. I’m not going to sit by and let you do the same lies you did last year. You know what you said about Teairra’s husband is wrong.

Devyn: I’m not losing it. I said something inappropriate and I apologize. No excuses.

Harlow: You literally spoke about Erica and I when we had the belly dancing session! I find it a bit hypocritical. You’re playing a stupid game. Don’t play it.

Devyn: Wait this is because I said “oh really. I didn’t know” to you and Erica being close? Girl, I don’t care about who your friends are. I’m glad you have friends. Erica is a good one.

Teairra: Well Harlow, I have a question for you as well actually…

We watch as the camera pans to Harlow who looks at Teairra intently…

Teairra: Speaking of you and Erica’s friendship, why are YOU telling everyone I’m jealous of it?

Harlow: I think you are, and I will stand by my opinion.

Teairra: I couldn’t give a DAMN about y’all’s friendship!

Devyn: Harlow is trying so hard to hit puberty and I’ll I hear is a squeaky voice that can’t hang with the Ladies.

Harlow: You’ve been keeping distance from me ever since Erica and I have been friends, and I find it weird.

Amal: I guess that coochie of yours Erica is made of diamonds. Amal laughs.

Teairra: It’s just looking like you’re stuck up her ass and I was defending you last year from the same woman. It just looks forced, but hey.

Erica: Real diamonds at that! Erica laughs with Amal as the arguing continues.

Harlow: It’s not forced Teairra! We’ve gotten close. That’s all. We’ve made up.

Teairra: And not only you were saying it, I’m hearing Amal and Devyn said the same thing you said? So, I’m lost. Do y’all really think I give a fuck? Teairra looks around the table.

Harlow: I was using context clues TEAIRRA! Maybe you weren’t, but I was sure thinking that!

Billie: Billie takes out a cigarette and lights it. These bitches are crazy.

Amal: I said that there may be some distance because of how close they had gotten. That was all. I didn’t speculate on your friendship or say anything negative about either of you

Teairra: I’m not, let’s be clear. I just want you to see how dumb you look right now.

Erica: This isn’t effective communication, whew.

Amal: Who looks dumb?

Teairra: Not talking to you, but that’s not the reason at all, its because she chooses to ignore me and rather hang with Erica. You can have a friend! Don’t act funny with me though. Because I AM hilarious.

Harlow: Teairra, I’ve called you thousands of times and my calls were not picked up! You’re being washed up right now Teairra.

Teairra: Washed up? Excuse you?

Erica: I don’t think everyone should be on Harlow right now… let’s just calm down and eat our deer!

Amal: Has anyone seen Mooki? Can we wrap this up?

Billie: I am ready to go honestly. Has anyone seen Grace?

Harlow: What are you going to do, Teairra? Harlow crosses her legs.

Teairra: I haven’t even moved from my seat, no need to shake. You have some new energy now because you have a new friend. Don’t do it Harlow.

Harlow: I’m not doing it. You’re pushing my buttons and I’m not here for it. Let’s ask one question. Why are you distancing yourself from me?

Teairra: I just said it boo.

Harlow: May you repeat it?

Teairra: You act like you’re so busy when it comes to me but I see you on Instagram with Erica.

Harlow: I literally invited you to dinner before the trip! You left me on read!

Teairra: One dinner Harlow? Really? I’m done with this conversation. Teairra puts her hand up.

Harlow: Go. Go ignore me like you’ve been doing.

Amal: So…this was a fun day out.

Teairra: You bitches need the communication skills clearly.

Mooki: Mooki walks up to the table. Ladiessssss! I’m glad it seems you all enjoyed the burgers. Be sure and take one for the road, or the River I mean. Mooki laughs.

Billie: Wait we have to paddle our asses back up this river?

Mooki: Kidding! Your fancy ole people behind the cameras got you all a bus. Just one though. looks at the angry ladies* The bus is up round the bend!

Teairra’s Confessional: I’ve been the nicest I’ve ever been on this trip, well from what I know because if this was back in Twitter it would’ve been another story. I dont need to go to Poconian jail!

Billie: Let’s go back to the house girls. I can’t take anymore screaming.

Harlow: Harlow stands up. I need a nap. I’ve been talking all day.

Devyn: Devyn stands and pulls Teairra aside. I really meant it when I said I was sorry. I don’t like being at odds with you.

Teairra: We can work on it, but I hear your apology and I acknowledge it.

Devyn: Thank you T. That’s all I can ask for. Let’s go to this bus and find a spa. My muscles need it after fighting that water.

We then watch as we see the Ladies board their bus, and the scene transition to several hours later in the day where we see the girls changed and ready to go to their final dinner in the Poconos. We watch as the camera pans through everyone’s rooms, showing their outfits and hair accessories laid across their rooms. We then focus in on Grace’s room, where we see Harlow knocking as the scene begins…

Harlow: Harlow walks into Grace’s room. Hello darling!

Harlow’s Confessional: This trip has been a trainwreck. Devyn and Teairra have been annoying bitches and honestly, I don’t know if I want to associate myself with them any longer. Harlow shrugs.

Grace: Hi Harlow, come in, come in. Are you getting ready with me tonight?

Harlow: Of course, I am! Why wouldn’t I?

Grace: Great! Have you enjoyed the trip?

Harlow: I have until that kayaking thingy. Harlow rolls her eyes as she grabs a curling iron.

Grace: Same. I’m so confused why Billie has a hard on for me.

Harlow: I don’t even recall what happened. Everything just blacked out.

Grace: What’s going on with you anyway? I feel like you haven’t been speaking to me.

Harlow: What do you mean? I feel like we’ve talked a lot.

Grace’s Confessional: I do feel a little upset with Harlow for not really having my back in this group, after I’ve had hers and we’re supposed to be good friends.

Grace: Well, earlier you didn’t say anything when Billie was doing that bullshit.

Harlow: I didn’t understand what was happening, Grace. I didn’t want to make myself look stupid by saying something that’s irrelevant to the conversation.

Grace: Sure, alright. I just don’t understand. Both Billie and Amal have been really awful to me on this trip.

Harlow: I feel like they keep talking about you, which I do find a bit weird.

Grace: What are they saying?

Harlow: Well… Harlow looks at her makeup pallet. They’re just always trying to pick a fight with you and talking about you.

Harlow’s Confessional: That was hard. I’m not trying to reveal Amal’s information about Grace and then get myself in the middle of it.

Grace: But what are they saying Harlow? They’re clearly saying something. What is it?

Harlow: I mean like the fighting, you know? They’re not secretly saying stuff about you.

Grace: Oh, okay. Well, that’s good then. What’s happening with you and Devyn and Teairra?

Harlow: I don’t even want to talk about it. Devyn is calling me a nobody, like is she that insecure? She’s crazy. She changed her face and still is irrelevant. And then, Teairra is acting like she didn’t ghost me because I became friends with Erica. It’s clear she’s jealous. It’s stupid. Too much is piling onto my life. Harlow puts her head down. My life is slowly falling apart. My ex-husband just continues to throw stupid accusations and lies against me just so that he could win custody of the kids and I can’t do it anymore! Harlow starts crying.

Grace: Grace hugs Harlow. You have been through the wringer hun, and I’m here for you. Don’t let these ladies give you a hard time.

Harlow: I know you are.

Grace: We’re fighters we’re successful and we’re where we are because we have worked so hard for it. Don’t take any shit from anyone, you hear me?

Harlow: I won’t Grace, I won’t.

Grace’s Confessional: I’ve always been there for Harlow and will continue to do so, I just…. I don’t believe her that the ladies aren’t saying something to her about me, and that’s a tough pill to swallow.

Harlow: I will burn those bitches to the ground tonight. I will bring out my inner Mooki.

Grace: Now let’s get ready and… Grace pops a bottle of champagne. Drink this because my friend, we have my booze here, we are celebrating us and our friendship.

As Grace and Harlow clink their glasses of champagne together, the scene shifts as we see Kaylani and Teairra making their way to Billie’s room where she is seen with her hairstylist….

Teairra: Teairra walks over to Billie. Hey, hey, oh my who’s this?!

Billie: Hey T, this is my hairdresser Ricky! He does my wigs for me! I figured I could come out with a new look for our final dinner tonight!

Kaylani’s Confessional: It’s here the last day in Poconos and it’s been some ups and downs on this trip but I’m glad to have gotten to bond with the girls. I think one thing that hasn’t been resolved is my relationship with Billie so I’m hoping to have a talk with her before dinner.

Kalyani: It seems like a whole army is in here.

Teairra: Hey Ricky! Are you ladies ready for tonight? I’m still trying to figure out what I want to wear.

Billie: Billie laughs. I do like to bring an entourage with me when I travel! I have champagne for us, and some gummies! Both will take the edge off. I’m honestly been tired of being the punching bag of this group this trip. So, I’m not too thrilled about tonight. Grace and Devyn seem to be allies now.

Kaylani: Kaylani hugs Teairra. I would hug you too Billie, but honestly, I don’t know where we stand. Kaylani laughs shadily. But let’s open some champagne and talk.

Teairra: I get it, it’s just been so much tea left and right on this trip, maybe the mountains is showing everyone’s true colors. Where’s the champagne?!

Billie: Billie laughs. I think we had a little bump in the road… Kaylani. But I will say it was messed up of me to say you should be fired next to Grace. I quickly learned that I should I’ve said Grace and Devyn both deserve to be fired. But you didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry for saying that about you!

Ricky: Ladies, here is the champagne. Ricky hands Teairra the champagne bottle. You do the honors of opening it… Billie doesn’t know how to treat her guests sometimes!

Kaylani: Yes, honestly when I saw that interview I was shocked that my friend said that about me and I know for the past week we haven’t been getting along, but you’re my sister so just make sure it never happens again or I would hate to go Compton on that ass. Kaylani laughs. But why would you say Devyn?

Billie’s Confessional: Look I am trying to end this trip better than when I came into it. I really shouldn’t have said that Kaylani should be fried from the show, because we as a group haven’t given her a chance to really show her potential. Sorry Kaylani, I should’ve said Devyn and not you! At least you add something.

Billie: You have my word on it won’t ever happen again, unless you give me a reason to! But Devyn, she’s a snake in the grass waiting to bite! You need to be careful with Devyn, Kaylani. One minute she wants you as a friend and next she’s making up lies about you.

Kaylani’s Confessional: I’m so happy and relieved to finally move this block in our friendship because at the end of the day Billie may be a motor mouth, I mean look at those juicy lips, but she’s still a good person something a lot of people don’t get the chance to see.

Teairra: You see how quick she was to go low with me and we were supposed to be friends honey.

Billie: Teairra is now seeing for herself what I was warning everyone last season about what she’s capable of.

Kaylani: Devyn and I had a good interaction in the mountains, we was supposed to be hanging out some time, but she seems like a nice person even though hearing her interaction with Teairra it seems like she may not be.

Billie: Just don’t tell her anything about your life that you don’t want to get thrown back in your face or don’t give her any ammunition to use against you.

Teairra’s Confessional: Devyn might’ve apologized like… 100 times but that will forever be on the back of my mind because bitch, that was weird. I would’ve never thought in 1000 years she would take it there, so I mean, the advice Billie is giving Kaylani is valid, she can hit you from the side at any moment.

Teairra: Literally, she was team Teairra until she wasn’t.

Billie: Until she found someone better…it’s sad because that’s supposed to be like a good sister of mine but she proves me wrong time and time again.

Teairra: I was hoping and praying I didn’t see the side you guys did, but she definitely rubbed me the wrong way. I mean she apologized, but is she expecting us to go back to how we were? She crossed a line.

Kaylani: I need to start making a list cause first it was Grace and now Devyn, and they both seem nice.

Teairra: It takes time for the lengths she took.

Billie: Teairra, you do what you want with her but I know for a fact if you were to do that to her, you’d never see the end of it. And Kaylani, just mental note it all. It’ll come in handy later on, I’m sure.

Teairra: Exactly, it would be held over my head I see she holds onto anything for dear life and uses it when she feels it’s necessary.

Billie’s Confessional: I’m glad that everyone is starting to see the nasty side to Devyn. And you know what I didn’t have to do anything to make her show it. She’s just a nasty person on her own. One minute she’s your friend and the next she’s trying to out your whole business.

Billie: Teairra, how are you feeling with Harlow? I talked to her after dinner the other night.

Teairra: Honestly, I don’t know, wasn’t expecting her to be so feisty. I don’t know who pumped her up like that, but that was definitely a different Harlow. I was expecting some conclusion but it just left me with more questions.

Billie: Well, I did find out that Harlow wasn’t the one that Devyn was talking to that night out in the hall, because I asked her.

Kaylani: I think that was nasty for Devyn to have done the with your husband that was wrong.

Billie: Watch out for her because she’ll do shit like that and then hide her hands. Kaylani, you be careful too because she’ll try and destroy your husband’s Marriott name.

Teairra: So, now there’s another issue that needs to be addressed, and of course it has to do with the one I thought I was the closest too.

Billie: Enough with those petty bitches! Kaylani, how are you feeling about your first girl’s trip with this group?

Kaylani’s Confessional: I’m glad to be on the good side with the girls now. I think this trip has gotten me closer with the girls as far as sisterhood, and it has opened my eyes to everyone good and bad side and how low some people will go. But this resort that me and my husband are building to add on to our hotels is almost done, and I’ll say this some of the girls was on the do not invite list but I’m glad to have mended things.

Billie: See that’s good Kaylani, I’m glad you are able to have made new connections in this group. Just always sleep with one eye open! Billie laughs.

Teairra: I’m glad to hear that, I hope you open up more about you because you’re such a cool girl! But just watch what you say because these girls keep tabs honey.

Billie: Bless Teairra’s heart last season all they did was attack her personal life it felt like. It was hard to watch and that’s why I got so defensive about Devyn bringing up her husband. Kaylani, you can always lean on Teairra. She’s a good friend to have in your corner that’s for sure!

Kaylani: I know that’s why I haven’t been able to tell some of the girls about the ongoing troubles in my marriage cause I don’t want that thrown in my face. Like I love my husband but it seems more of a business relationship than anything else.

Teairra: Thank you Billie, that means a lot! Because she knows the hell I went through and still decided to do that, that’s why i just… girl, I don’t want to get mad again.

Billie: Yeah, bringing marriage problems to this group will bite you in the ass I wouldn’t let many people in on your struggles Kaylani. You’ve worked too hard for your marriage for any of these miserable bitches to mess it up.

Teairra: It didn’t go exactly as planned but you know, the house isn’t damaged at least!

Billie: The house isn’t damaged and we have one last dinner to see if we can make anyway for more peace in this group. Billie laughs. Let’s drink up to girls that just want to have fun and have true sisterhood.

Kaylani: Yes, but I’m glad to have some good girls in my corner like Billie, Teairra, and Amal to help me navigate, but yes, I think that’s from me trying to prove myself but I’m trying to show them my sweet side then my spicy side. But we should definitely get ready for this dinner. It’s almost time.

Billie: Kaylani, I’m glad we cleared the air, because I do enjoy our friendship and when we have fun! Girls, come back down in like 30 minutes and I want to get your thoughts on my look!

We watch as Teairra and Kaylani depart the room, before the scene transitions out and we see a shot of all the Ladies putting the finishing touches on their looks before climbing into their SUVs as we see shots of the winding mountain roads. We then watch as the Ladies arrive at an upscale restaurant in the Poconos as they all get out and take their seats at the table, as tense music slowly begins to play before the women begin to speak…

Amal’s Confessional: The final dinner is upon us. I’m praying to all the Gods, the Jesus, the Buddha and the Allah that we can enjoy a civilized meal but that seems to be too right for this group of wrong girls.

Erica: So, how does everyone feel the trip has been?

Harlow: It was fun. I love the Poconos. It was cute.

Billie: This trip has had its highs and lows! More lows than highs!!

Teairra: Definitely was a rollercoaster ride. Teairra laughs. When it was fun, it was fun.

Kaylani: I think it’s been good for the most part, the good and bad and I think a lot of healing, but a lot of damage as well. But I think it made us stronger in my opinion.

Amal: I’ve loved the trip! I found a piece of seaweed in my crotch after Erica tried to DROWN ME but besides that it’s been great. Amal laughs.

Harlow: The canoe traumatized me when Kaylani and I crashed into that rock!

Teairra: I can definitely say, the next time I come back it’ll be with my husband!

Devyn: It’s been good, it’s been bad. At times ugly. Devyn shakes her head.

Erica: I’ve actually had a fun time and got to really clear my mind. Erica laughs. I’m actually glad that I’m getting to a better place with you Kaylani and hoping to have that talk back in Twitter with you Amal. It was cute.

Billie: I think some of us healed and some us need healing after this trip. I am just sitting here on high alert tonight after my game went wrong the other night.

Amal: Oh definitely. We’re grabbing lunch when we’re back. Lunch might turn into dinner which might turn into a sleepover.

Grace: Kaylani, you’re a dark horse, a woman of mystery!

Erica: Erica laughs. Amal, lord knows I’ve been a bit lonely in my house anyways!

Harlow’s Confessional: I really like Kaylani. After this trip, I realized of how much fun of a person she is. I didn’t like how she handled herself in the beginning, but she’s a lovely person.

Billie: I was glad Kaylani and I talked. We have worked through some things and I apologized to her for saying she should be fired from the show! So, I’m glad I’m leaving here on better foot than I came in.

Kaylani: Yes, I’m relieved to have made amends with you Erica because you definitely seem like a fun girl and I think we just both got off on the wrong foot so the trip was definitely needed.

Erica: I think so too Kaylani. Like I know my ass ain’t as big as you and Amal’s but it still shakes OKAY!

Grace: Hallelujah praise Jesus the tables healed.

Kaylani: You too Grace, I think it’s vice versa a lady of the night perhaps in your case.

Billie: Grace is definitely a mystery.

Grace: Nothing about me is a mystery, girls. BYT best-selling book, remember?

Amal shakes her ass laughing at Erica but then looks around as she seeing the arguing ensue and returns to her seat…

Billie: She don’t like to open up girls. Then wonders why I say she doesn’t fit in with this group.

Harlow: Are there drinks?

Amal’s Confessional: So here I am trying to show the girls my ass in hopes of uniting the girls but no Billie and Grace want to start arguing. When did this group get to a place where a little ass couldn’t bring them together?

Billie: Hey Grace, I was scrolling on Twitter today and seen this was posted about you.. it’s being reported by Taylor Thompson that you have created Goodness Gracious as a Ponzi scheme.

Erica: Whew!

Billie: Since we are laying it all out there, and we want to talk about legal situations. Share with the class what’s going on?

Teairra’s Confessional: Well, I WAS going to ask both Billie and Grace were they going to speak, but it seems like Billie already had it on her agenda!

Grace: What are you talking about?

Erica’s Confessional: I think everyone saw the article earlier today, I was just waiting to see who had enough balls to actually ask Grace about it.

Kaylani: Oh wow, another criminal mastermind?

Harlow’s Confessional: I don’t think Grace is capable of creating a Ponzi scheme. She’s just… how can I word it?

Grace: You’re absolutely deluded. You need help Billie seriously.

Billie: Billie hands Grace her phone. You can see for yourself. It clearly says that you started Goodness Gracious as a scam to pocket money. I’m assuming it’s to make up for the legal costs that you are having to use to pay to save your champagne business! Look, I’m asking you about things I see online since you started it.

Grace: No Billie, I don’t talk to the press. Unlike you do, I don’t crave attention like you do. My podcast is with IHeart.

Erica: So, there’s no Ponzi scheme, right? We don’t need you in Jail with Luci, Grace!

Grace: Call them up and ask, how would I do that?

Billie: Who cares who your podcast is with? Even IHeart makes mistakes.

Kaylani: When was the last show you did Grace?

Grace: You’re a nasty bitch! And shame on you, yes, I was late to this trip because I was in court, which nobody seemed to care about.

Erica: Erica jumps back and her eyes widen. Woah.

Teairra: Court?!

Grace: A champagne business that you wanted to join Billie, so let’s not go down that road. I’ve got a lot in my vault about you honey. So, shut up!

Billie: Well, given you don’t care to talk about my legal situation which is painful to me. I don’t give a FLYING FUCK what you have to say. If it’s in the vault, let’s talk about it.

Grace’s Confessional: Billie wants to play then we can play, but I’ll be sure to save what I have on her until the time is right. Karma is coming.

Grace: Talk about it then! Since you know all about me! It reeks of jealously really, that’s so sad. To be honest, I’m surprised there’s not more legal issues with you Billie considering how YOU do business.

Billie: I’m waiting on you to open that vault… Because I’m sure if you want to go, there we can. Let’s talk about your porn video that’s being talked about in the group. Billie looks at Amal. I don’t think we are jealous of an old hag Nancy who reeks of nursing home and cheap perfume.

The camera pans to Harlow whose jaw drops at Billie’s announcement…

Amal: Amal looks at Billie in shock. BILLIE!!

Erica: Erica gasps. PORN VIDEO?

Grace: A WHAT? Grace laughs. Put it on! Play it for the people!

Billie: Everyone knows that you’ve done porn videos for money.

Harlow’s Confessional: See, I heard she was dating a porn star, but she’s in a PORN VIDEO?!? Who would want to pay to see Grace’s naked body? Nobody is raising their hands.

Billie: I mean it reeks of desperation honestly.

Grace: No, that’s you bitch. I don’t need to be paid for sex, unlike you. Desperate for an Emmy.

Amal: I’d love to be paid for sex

Harlow: Harlow shakes her head. I don’t need to see Grace’s sex tape. Don’t turn it on.

Billie: I mean you are so worried about everyone else’s business; I would think you’d worried about them skeletons in your closet at home.

Teairra’s Confessional: II heard about the pornstar boyfriend from Amal herself, but I did NOT know she actually became a pornstar with the man, I’m just as shocked as everybody else here. I’m sorry Grace, but I can’t even imagine what that looks like.

Grace: Harlow, it doesn’t exist.

Erica: Well Grace, are you actually a pornstar?

Grace: Erica, seriously, you’re gonna join in too?

Erica: Whew, well I’ll keep it all the way real here, it’s been going around the group that you’ve been sleeping around with a pornstar but since I wasn’t there for the conversation, I’ll open the floor up to the person who brought this information up… Amal. Erica cuts into her steak and takes a bite.

Kaylani: Well damn Grace, your pockets must be loaded first a PPP scam, Porn Videos and a shady champagne business.

Billie: Amal, you’re awfully quiet tonight.

Harlow: I wonder what Grace’s pornstar name would be!

Grace: Well?! SPEAK UP HADID!

Amal: Amal looks down. Well…umm…yeah…umm…

Billie’s Confessional: I think I heard she was in a porn video, but maybe it was she was with a porn star. Either way her freaky ass is at home making home videos on a camcorder.

Amal: Did I tell the girls you were dating a pornstar? Absolutely. Amal nods. I did.

Grace: Grace sips her wine. No. He’s a former adult film performer.

Erica: 10 inches hun, 10 inches.

Amal: Grace? Don’t lie to these ladies

Grace: He doesn’t do it anymore. Because he works with me.

Harlow: Grace, that’s equivalent to a porn star…

Billie: Making a porn video and dating a porn star is the same thing. Billie laughs. Listen, if you can actually get you a porn star then more power to you!

Amal pulls up the photo on her phone and shows the screen around the table…

Amal: Is this not Romain Grand? The 10-inch wonder of the adult world?

Kaylani: Wait Amal, that’s the same guy that was in my DMs.

Erica: 10 inches? Girl how is the orgas- OOP. Kaylani, he was in your DMs?

Grace: Girls, just be happy for me what’s the issue.

Harlow: KAYLANI! Harlow laughs.

Billie: The fact that you lie, we can’t be happy for a liar

Grace: No, I asked him if he knew any of you and he said no. What am I lying about billie?

Kaylani: Yes, it was about a month ago but I don’t know if they were dating around that time, but it’s definitely true tea.

Teairra’s Confessional: Kaylani also did tell me the man was in her DMs, I was expecting to be the one to deliver this information but I’m glad somebody else is doing it! Work ladies!

Billie: I think I’ve opened enough can of worms for one dinner. We will save it for Twitter.

Grace: I’m still waiting on what I lied about Billie? What about your old assistant you fucked over Billie? What about that old woman you hit with your car when you were driving? There’s a lot here. Billie says a LOT when she’s drunk.

Erica: Oh…I don’t think we should go that far!

Amal: Guys, this is getting ridiculous!

Harlow: Is everyone in this group a criminal?!


Amal: Criminals of Twitter.

Erica: Harlow, who else is a criminal?

Billie: Billie laughs. Apparently so Harlow! I’m a criminal. Where’s my mugshot?

Grace: None of you know the pressure and stress I’ve been through.

Harlow: Grace don’t scream at me I’m just pointing out that everyone seems to have illegal actions against them!

Amal: Pressure and stress? With that 10-incher laid up next to you in the bed? What is so stressful about that?

Billie: Grace is a criminal, but I thought the rest of us had clean records.

Erica: Not me girl. Erica sips her drink. Teairra, are you a criminal?

Teairra: No, so I would love to hear who else has illegal actions.

Amal: I have a few unpaid parking tickets but that’s about it.

Grace: Yeah, sure. Let’s believe that.

Billie: Who else has legal actions against them, Harlow!?

Harlow: I’m not saying everyone, I was exaggerating! You’re accusing Grace of being a criminal and you apparently ran over an old woman so!

Grace: I just have one question before I can move on. Harlow, did you know about the porn rumor about me?

Harlow: Harlow looks at Amal and takes a deep breath. Yes.

Grace’s Confessional: I asked her again because I can tell when she’s lying. So, let’s set a trap and see what happens.

Billie: Damn, this girl don’t have any real friends. Billie laughs. Sad.

Grace: Grace looks upset. Got it.

Harlow: I didn’t want to get in the middle of it Grace!

Grace: Looks like you’re right Billie!

Billie’s Confessional: Maybe I should try and make up with Grace. She seems to have no friends in this group. She swims with sharks and we are all waiting to bite!

Grace’s Confessional: I’m so done with this group, they’re all out for themselves and have no loyalty. Were we ever all friends? It seems all so fake and produced. I’ll sit back and eat my dinner.

Billie: Harlow, none of by that fake peaceful act you are trying to pull. First it was you meddling in mine and Erica’s relationship and now you turned on your long-time friend Teairra for what?

Erica’s Confessional: As much as I adore Harlow now, she does have a tendency to leave out important information when it comes to her friend, Grace. I know she just over analyzes everything but at the end of the day, Grace is your friend, girl.

Billie: And then now you can’t be in the middle of telling Grace what they were saying about her.

Teairra: Teairra sips her drink. Sounds like a opportunist to me.

Harlow: Oh my god Billie, just shut up. Don’t call me an opportunist Teairra! I am not!

Amal: Let’s not call names. We’re civilized women enjoying a civilized meal.

Teairra: I’m just calling it for what it is sweetie, you owe no real loyalty clearly. Grace was your last real friendship yikes.

Erica: Erica cuts into her alligator. I like Harlow!

Harlow: How many times did I call you and you didn’t pick up! HOW MANY TEAIRRA?! I CALLED YOU DAY AFTER DAY AND I FELT GHOSTED!

Grace: Ha, I know how that feels.

Teairra: When I’m busy Harlow! I have a job, I don’t know what you do when you’re not being a jeweler, but I’m busy!

Harlow: I know your schedule and the times I called; you were home in bed! We called day after day but then you suddenly started blocking me out of your life!

Amal’s Confessional: Not you know her schedule…that’s a bit much Harlow girl

Harlow: And guess what, it started around the time when Erica and I started becoming friends! What a coincidence!

Teairra: Girl, what we’re not going to do is turn this on me because YOU were being inconsistent and a fake bitch, okay?

Harlow: I WAS THE INCONSISTENT ONE?! What a joke!

Teairra: Don’t yell at me, I’m sipping my tequila and trying to shut you up, but you just continue to talk and talk you just love hearing yourself yell, don’t you?

Harlow: Don’t make me some kind of a villain because that’s one thing I’m not! You are a dumb little bitch that needs some fixing at the repair shop because this isn’t the Teairra I know!

Grace: Hurts doesn’t it when your friend doesn’t make the effort.

Harlow’s Confessional: Suddenly, the group wants to target me and make me seem like the bad guy?! What the FUCK!

Erica: Erica puts her hand on Harlow’s shoulder. No it’s okay, it’s okay.

Harlow picks up a Napkin and wipes her face as dark music grows…

Harlow’s Confessional: The urge for me to just throw that napkin at her and shut her up is growing.

Teairra: Dumb little bitch? Teairra grabs the table and shakes it. HARLOW SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!

Harlow: Harlow stands up. YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Amal: Amal shifts back in her seat. NO, NO, NO.

Grace: Oh, the children are fighting.

Teairra: Teairra stands up. Bitch hold up, DONT STAND UP!

Harlow: Harlow points her finger at Teairra. You are a dumb little bitch and I’ll say it over and over!

Teairra: Continue being the FAKE BITCH you are! You did it to Grace. You did it to ME! Who’s next??

Erica: Teairra this is YO TRIP!


Grace: Harlow you don’t know HOW TO BE A FRIEND!

Teairra: NO ERICA I don’t give a fuck, get your friend then! She STOOD UP.

Kaylani: Now ladies, what would Mooki think about this behavior let’s be peaceful and sit down!

Billie: Teairra, Let’s just sit down. It isn’t worth it. You have more to lose than her!


Harlow: Grace I didn’t want to continue to have you spiral!

Teairra: Girl, you’re a sneaky fake bitch is what you are. Teairra sits down. You try to play a saint and you’re nothing but the opposite. You can go run off and cry like you usually do.

Erica: Erica grabs Harlow. Look at me! It’s okay girly! Don’t let her get you out of character like this!

Teairra: She should be lucky the drinks didn’t fall on her.

Harlow: I’m not gonna run off. I’m staying right where I am. You are so desperate for attention seriously.

Teairra: You stood up bitch! You want it with me!

Harlow: You BROUGHT this situation up in front of the group. We could’ve talked about it in private. But, of course, you want to be a bitch and bring it up in the group setting!

Teairra: Teairra waves Harlow away. Harlow, please save it, be lucky we’re in the Poconos. You’re deflecting because you’re being called out.

Amal’s Confessional: At this point, I’m running around like a chicken with their head cut off. I’m checking on Harlow. I’m checking on Teairra. I’m going to the bathroom. I’m pulling down my dress. It’s too much.

Grace: This is just so sad.

Harlow: I’m deflecting?! Bitch please! I’m staying right where I am!

Kaylani’s Confessional: Them standing up brought me back to those Compton days. Kaylani laughs. Those were the days.

Billie: I think we have reached an all-time low in this group. It’s sad to see we have gotten ourselves here

Teairra: I have been trying to keep it together for the sake of the trip! But she’s been itching for it, seriously.

Grace: You seem to start all the shit Billie. So don’t act surprised.

Harlow: No, you have not!! YOU STARTED THIS SHIT TEAIRRA!

Teairra: I didn’t start a DAMN thing, are you fucking crazy? I mean I know some screws are missing, but get real.

Billie’s Confessional: it really is sad that this has happened. I am speechless. A Producer says, “You know you started most of it right, Billie?” Billie then laughs and replies, Oh I did? At least someone is being honest in this group.

Harlow: I’m as real as they come.

Erica’s Confessional: I’ve been watching this group burn down to the ground because once you pull away the common denominator or common villain, you realize none of these girls were truly friends. It’s just sad but very entertaining to watch. Hopefully, these girls can get it together back in Twitter.

Amal: I think dinner is done ladies?

Erica: Please let it be done.

Teairra: Teairra laughs. As real as that jewelry line.

Billie: Well Grace if it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t know about what the streets are saying for you. This has been an insightful trip for me. I’m seeing who’s my friends and who is not.

Harlow: It’s realer than whatever your businesses are! Harlow stands up and walks away.

Amal: Amal walks out after Harlow. It’s okay Harlow! It’s okay!

Teairra: Teairra watches Harlow walk away. Stupid bitch, she literally told me last time we spoke… Teairra does airquotes. “What are you going to do Teairra?” You say that to a friend? Really? Bitch please.

Grace’s Confessional: This group is as divided as ever after what should have been a connective trip, I don’t know where we go from here.

Harlow: She wants to lie and say I never contacted her and left her hanging?! What is wrong with Teairra!! Is she hallucinating?! I can’t. I cannot wait to get back home.

Amal: Amal hugs Harlow. It’s going to be okay. Just calm down babe.

Teairra’s Confessional: I’m done playing nice with Harlow, I let her get away with it for too long, and seeing how she’s done Grace… somebody who knew her for YEARS before anyone else shows anybody can be next on her hit list.

As we see the rest of the group beginning to collect their things and exit the restaurant, the camera pans out as the scene and episode come to an end.



Ladies of Twitter

Ladies of Twitter is a fictional virtual reality series on Twitter. Catch up on all 15 seasons, and catch season 16’s new episodes Sundays & Wednesdays HERE!