Season 5 – Episode 10: ‘Picking Up The Apples’

Ladies of Twitter
8 min readAug 7, 2018

As the opening credits close, the episode opens to a sunny day on the orchard in California. We see Brian helping his servers set up the breakfast for all the ladies…

Brian’s Confessional: After last nights Joshuaa massacre, we all need to have a little brunch discussion.

Brian: *To a server* Can you get some more coffee on the go please? *pauses* Hi ladies!

Devyn: We seem to be missing someone.

Brian: *waves hands in the air* I call that dead weight!

Ava’s Confessional: Disaster isn’t the appropriate word to describe this trip so far and after dinner and Joshuaa leaving early Im trying to hold it all together.

Tyler: Hi ladies, Hope everyone slept well? God knows I’m staring!

Brian: Starving for more blood? *laughs* Speaking of bloody things.. where is Joshuaa?

Ava: Joshuaa decided to leave last night ladies, did you not see?

Brian: Well thank god for that!

Billie: Well I figured since you two were joined at the hip you two just didn’t sleep together. But hey, I guess it isn’t as pretty as it looks on the outside.

Ava: *ignores Billie* There was a lot of negativity and lies spread so it was best for him to go

Lauralie: He did the right thing.

Tyler: There weren’t lies told by me so I don’t know what you’re referring to Ava.

Ava: …I didn’t call anyone out specifically Tyler, I just said lies in general

Devyn: I fee bad for Joshuaa though. *side eyes Tyler* Some people don’t know when to shut up.

Billie: I mean we are in California for gods sake on an orchard farm. Why are we dwelling on the petty shit?!

Brian: Yes, Joshua ruined my business trip! Let’s get positive!

Lauralie’s Confessional: Blame others for your failures

Devyn: You can hardly blame Joshuaa for ruining your business trip. It was ruined the moment you invited 7 people who don’t all get along. Your bad.

Billie ends the conversation by insisting on making a toast to Brian

Billie: Here’s to Brian’s business, sunny side California, and booze all day err day! Cheers ladies!!

The ladies all reluctantly cheers

Brian: Okay ladies! The apple orchard is just around the corner, shall we start?

Brian has arranged for all the ladies to go out into an orchard for a beautiful apple picking, which will all be used for his new cider business.

Brian: Here we are! Apples apples everywhere! Take a bag and fill it up! I’m making sure the Apple will be secure on our jet home!

Billie: I love me a glass of apple rosé now I just need apples to make it!

Tyler: Oh wow this is picturesque!

Lauralie: This reminds me of my hometown Reims.

Tyler: Reims! Yes! It was so stunning there when you took us Lauralie

Billie: Well some of us weren’t there so let’s talk about the NOW

Brian: *Brings over a tall ladder* which one of you hookers wants to climb up and get juicy Apple?! *Devyn volunteers* Lauralie! Why don’t you go up the ladder and risk your life for us?? I’ll hold the ladder!

Devyn’s Confessional: I was gonna climb but I’ll stand here looking cute.

Billie: I bet Lauralie could climb up that tree like a bear

Brian: I’ve seen those toe nails Lauralie! You give raccoons a run for their money!

Both Brian and Billie laugh as Lauralie continues ignoring their comments

Lauralie’s Confessional: I’m not wasting my breath on that low class

Brian: Okay, everyone got their apples?

Devyn: I did. Let’s go shop because *checks watch* I’ll be on call in a matter of hours!

Brian: I hear ya! Pack up your rooms ladies and meet downstairs in an hour!

Billie: I’m ready to drop a couple thousands!

Devyn’s Confessional: People that flaunt money, really don’t have any.

Billie’s Confessional: Since owning Billie’s Chateau and dating I have came into some money so these girls that get pissed about me flaunting money can kiss MY ASS

As the scene ends, we see a shot of California’s gorgeous setting and the sun shining down on Brian’s orchard. The ladies all exit the car and all get excited for their shopping ahead. As the ladies enter the car, we see time fast forward as we follow the car. The ladies all exit as they arrive at some gorgeous boutiques.

Tyler’s Confessional: Finally something to enjoy with these ladies, shopping. Hopefully there isn’t any bull because this is the last memory we will have of the trip!

Devyn’s Confessional: Let’s shop!

Devyn sees a store called Pleasure Chest

Devyn’s Confessional: Note to self, that’s the store I’m headed too!

Devyn: Ava! Let’s go in this store and get some gifts for baby Hugo!

Tyler: Who want’s to come into this dress store with me?

Brian: Yes let’s go! Show us around…

Lauralie: Is it your store, Tyler?

Tyler: I just have the store in Twitter for now, but one day I’d love to have a shop here too. Have them all across the country *laughs* That’s the dream.

Lauralie: Jac who?

Tyler and Brian both laugh

Tyler: Girls! I have finished my book by the way! I’ll tell the other ladies when they get back from baby shopping as well.

Billie: While you were on the trip! If I must say, you’re a hustler!

Lauralie: Who is your ghost writer? Did you have one? *laughs*

The scene cuts to Devyn and Ava shopping for baby gifts for Joshuaa’s son, Hugo.

Devyn: I’m sad Joshuaa left but that enviroment was way too toxic. He deserves better.

Ava: I wish he would have stayed and roughed it out with us.

Ava and Devyn pay for their items and head into the dress store where they see something awkward is happening

Lauralie: Did I say something? *looks*

Tyler: I did not. I have someone proofreading and stuff but I wrote it. It’s kind of written in a diary form so it wasn’t too hard to write

Tyler’s Confessional: Hi, congrats on your book! Did you write it? *rolls eyes* B I T C H!

Lauralie: Good job, at least you wrote it!

Billie: You may need a ghost reader, because any error when reading it, these girls will scold you

Tyler: Thanks Lauralie *laughs* And I’m not worried. I’m prepared that some won’t like the book. It’s the way of the world

Ava: What’s this about the book? Congrats again.

Tyler: If I sell one copy though or one billion, I’m happy to have written it. Oh hi girls, I was just telling the others that I finished my book last night after we went to our rooms!

Brian: What is it about again?

Tyler: It’s about the period from getting pregnant with a Emma to now. So about two years of my life and me starting the store, being pregnant, working, things that I did last year, things like that.

Ava’s Confessional: I just hope Tyler is really careful because this book could be the nail in her coffin with Joshuaa.

Lauralie: Yeah. I bet it is hard for a woman in her forties to be a mom.

Tyler laughs and agrees

Devyn: Did you mention trying to ruin Jac By Jac Carter? Asking for a friend.

Devyn’s Confessional: We know he takes no accountability for his actions. But it needed to be said. Everybody else was thinking it.

Tyler: Once we are back in Twitter I plan to have a- *hears Devyn* Well for your friend, I doubt she has all the facts and I discuss what happened on my side, yes. I apologize for things I did with that as well. As I’ve always said, this book is about me owning everything I’ve done good, bad, and ugly. Aside from one thing actually. But that was at that person’s request.

Devyn: Owing your mistakes while trying to make money. Nothing says “I’m sorry” like padding your bank account.

All the other ladies look on in awkward silence

Ava: Well Devyn maybe she’s sharing the proceeds to those included *looks at Tyler*

Billie: So who fed you this information because I was around and I don’t even know the half of it

Brian: Ugh! Who the hell cares?

Tyler: You’re right it doesn’t. Neither does the fact that had you waited until my book reading, which I was about to invite you all to, you would have found out that half of the sales of my book will be going to a charity for underprivileged women who are trying to get better jobs, housing, and educations. And then there are other people I intend to discuss things with before final release.

Ava’s Confessional: I like the idea of giving half the proceeds to charity but what is the charity going to do with $10? *blank stare*

Tyler: I’ve learnt from my mistakes

Devyn: *checks watch* Anyways I gotta go. It’s been so very eventful. Brian, you have great products. Congrats.

Tyler’s Confessional: Oh my god, that barking bitch is finally leaving. She’s arguing with everyone who will let her close enough to hear the conversation, for fucks sake.

Tyler: Okay ladies, well this was sunny California *laughs* Next stop, home sweet Twitter!

As the ladies get into the car together, Ava reacts to something that Lauralie says…

Lauralie: I‘m gonna miss California. They don’t have self proclaimed doctors here.

Ava: Lauralie, You’re SO pressed. Let it go.

Lauralie: I thought you were busy spending your husband’s money, I didn’t notice you there.

Ava: My husband is deceased. Be real careful sis.

Brian: BOOM!

Lauralie: I heard you gave him that heart attack anyway. I bet.

Ava: Don’t EVER talk about my fucking husband you piece of shit.

Lauralie: Look at you threatening another woman, where is your class?

Ava: You’re right… it’s not, but this is *lunges toward Lauralie*

Devyn grabs Ava in time to stop her doing anything

Devyn: Ava let’s go sis. This ain’t been worth it. C’mon!

Billie: WOW. okay.

Lauralie: You want your children to see you like that? *claps*

Ava: Go fuck yourself. trash.

Brian: Lauralie? Why do you ALWAYS cause issues?

Lauralie shakes her head as Ava takes a deep breath. Tyler and Brian look at each other and Devyn holds Ava’s hand and Billie giggles about what just transpired. As the ladies all calm down and sit into their seats, the car moves out of parking and takes the ladies to the airport, where the scene and the episode ends.

Ladies of Twitter airs Tuesdays-Thursdays at 7/6c

--

--

Ladies of Twitter

Ladies of Twitter is a fictional virtual reality series on Twitter. Catch up on all 15 seasons, and catch season 16’s new episodes Sundays & Wednesdays HERE!